Hot Slut Of The Day!

Paco, an 18-year-old toothless Chihuahua from Florida who took “get off my lawn” to new, bold bitch levels when he scared a coyote into getting off his lawn!

If that bad bitch glare from Paco caused you to flinch, jump and cower behind your chair, you’re not alone. Not only would that “don’t even think of stepping to me” squint make Satan run for his mommy, it also made a coyote fall out if itself in fear and skedaddle away. Paco’s human, T.J. Jones,  gave KOB4 video from a security camera of Paco taking off his earrings, Vaseline-ing up his face, taking off his shoes and putting his bag down to handle a trespassing coyote. Behind T.J. and Paco’s house in Pasco County, FL is an abandoned train line with brush covering it, and so coyotes hide out there. Last Thursday, one not-knowing coyote trespassed into their yard, and it probably thought it was going to leave with a tiny, shredded dog in its mouth, but it left with shredded pieces of its ego in its mouth instead.

The camera caught toothless Paco barking at the coyote until T.J. came out and scared the trespasser away. I hear you Florida haters saying, “Paco must be toothless from meth. Typical Florida!” Excuse you, ho, but Paco is toothless from old age. Being toothless also didn’t keep Paco from scaring off that coyote. You know you’re a badass abuelo when you can scare off a trick even with your dentures out.

T.J., who inherited Paco from his dad, says that the Chihuahua got his brawniness from a pit bull who used to live with them.

“He’s 18. He doesn’t have a tooth in his head. He’s a little sweetheart. He was my Dad’s dog. I’d lose it if I lost him. He’s always had the big mouth and had the brawn behind him.”

Watch Paco in action, and also watch him throw a, “yes, I did THAT,” face at the cameras.

T.J. is wrong about the pit bull thing, though. My Chihuahua grew up around me, cats and stuffed animals and he still thinks he’s tough shit. It’s a mixture of stupidity and a Napoleon complex. One time when we were at my mom’s house, my dog was barking his tonsils off at something and when I went into the backyard, I found him going after a raccoon. That raccoon could’ve easily tore my Chihuahua’s face off with one swipe, but it just stood there. The raccoon was probably was too busy laughing in the inside over the delusion of my dog. That’s what that coyote in Paco’s yard was most likely doing too (don’t tell Paco I said that).

Pic: KOB4 (For Melissa)