Prince Hot Ginge And Meghan Markle Brought Some Kay Jeweler’s Ad Campaign Cheesiness To Their Engagement Photos
When it comes to these two, every kiss begins with karghkarekbjklkjuouenafslarzdrkjl, which is the bloody guttural wail that comes blasting out of my mouth after these two shove their ~❤️~sweet warm beautiful love~❤️~ down our throats again. There are many things I want shoved down my throat, but Prince Hot Ginge and Meghan Markle’s love ain’t one of them. However, I am thankful that they dropped their official engagement pictures onto the internet right before Christmastimes. Because now when I’m at a family Christmas party and one of my cousins asks me what’s new in my life, I can pull out my phone, bring up this picture (with my face copy + pasted over Meghan’s) and tell them that I’m engaged… and then my cousin will distract me with something shiny as they call in the men in white coats.
This morning, Kensington Palace’s Twitter and Instagram pages delivered PHG and MM’s official engagement portraits, which were shot by photographer Alexi Lubomirski. The British royal engagement rules must state that every engaged royal couple must post for a picture that looks like an ad for a mall jewelry store, because Prince William and Duchess Kate’s engagement portrait looked like one too. But the similarities end there. In Prince William and Duchess Kate’s other engagement portraits, she’s dressed like a grandma of the bride, while Meghan is dressed like a common tart trollop!!!!! Prepare to drop your crumpet and fall back with shock!
The biddies of Britain are definitely filling up hospitals all over England today after they got the faints from seeing a future British royal wearing a gown with a sinful sheer whore top! That divorced American slag skeezer actress is tainting the pristine wholesome image of the royal family with her trashy American whoriness!!! (Examples of the royal family’s wholesome image can be found here, here and here.)
And here’s another one, but at least in this one, Meghan knows she’s shaming the British royals with her EXPOSED chest skin and tried to cover up!
Even though Meghan Markle’s sheer top will probably bring down the monarchy (Morrissey must be her stylist), that gown is still going to sell out. Because almost everything that Meghan Markle has worn since the engagement news came out has sold out. That white coat she wore at the photo-op for her engagement news? GONE! That bag she carried during her first day on the job as a professional hand shaker? SOLD OUT! That dress that she wore to pre-Christmas lunch at THE QUEEN’s yesterday (you know, the dress we barely saw)? You better try to get the McCall’s pattern for that dress and make it yourself, because it’s not in stores anymore!
The dress that Meghan Markle wore in her engagement photos was made by Ralph & Russo and it reportedly costs $75,000. So if you’re the kid of a hardcore royal-loonie, then boo hoo for you, bitch, because your Christmas is going to suck. Your mom is going to clear out the bank accounts, take a second mortgage out on your house and return your presents to buy that gown. Sure you’ll be eating mud and dandelion stem sandwiches for Christmas breakfast, but mom is going to look gorgeous in her Meghan Markle engagement picture gown!
Pic: Alexi Lubomirski/@KensingtonRoyal