Afternoon Crumbs

November 17, 2017 / Posted by:

Star Magazine wants us to think that Nicole Kidman took pole dancing lessons and gives Keith Urban a hot show in their bedroom. What lies. First of all, it would be hard for Nicole to give Keith a full pole show when her icy fingers stick to metal every time she touches it. Second of all, I think Keith is the one giving Nicole a hot show. Just thinking of him whipping his frosty locks around as he works that pole is taking me to loin-tingling places – Celebitchy

Remind me not to see the mostly-silent horror movie A Quiet Place on an empty stomach, because I do not need to be that trick whose stomach growls all loud-like in that quiet ass theater – Lainey Gossip

Every Lhaso Apso in the world should sue Kyle Richards for stealing their signature hairstyle – Reality Tea

Danny Masterson’s rape accusers are still speaking out, as Netflix continues to stay quiet, because Scientology has gotten to them, or like everyone else, they forgot they had a show called The RanchPajiba

Meanwhile, Trump is instructing his minions to put a giant “Grab ‘Em By The Pussy” sticker on the back of Air Force One – Towleroad

Someone’s kink is definitely seeing Barbara Palvin as a terrifying lollipop clown jack-in-the-box – Drunken Stepfather

Margot Robbie is a pair of Doc Martens, a fake anarchy tattoo and a bomber jacket away from looking like every girl in my 8th grade class – Popoholic

Sylvester Stallone, who was once accused of paying off the half-sister he allegedly abused for years, denies raping a 16-year-old in 1986 – AV Club

Emily RideAJetski is giving you bored mannequin with a backache – Hollywood Tuna

Bill Hader and Maggie Carey, his wife of 11 years, are getting a divorce. If this shit goes the way most celebrities splits have been going lately, then I’m sure we’ll find out that she left him after he got caught fucking the 18-year-old nanny and kicking their new pet puppy – Just Jared

Rest in peace, Wendy PepperVulture

Pic: Wenn.com

SHARE
Our commenting rules are pretty simple: If you make any overly offensive comment (racist, bigoted, etc..) or go way off topic when not in an Open Post, your comments will be deleted and you will be banned. If you see an offensive or spammy comment you think should be deleted, flag it for the mods and they'll be forever grateful and give you their first born (although, you probably don't want that).

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >