Hot Slut Of The Day!

October 25, 2017 / Posted by:

Selena Gomez’s graphic art masterpiece for her new song Wolves!

Selena Gomez’s new song Wolves came out today, and if you haven’t heard it yet and are guessing that it sounds like another moody EDM slow jam that The Weeknd literally wrote in his sleep before rejecting it for himself, you’re right! But even though I’m not feeling Wolves (which is apparently about Lupus), I’m grateful it exists, because if it didn’t, we wouldn’t have this stunningly magical cover art.

The smiling coffee cup on the right is EDM producer Marshmello. He’s an inspiration to all handless coffee cups everywhere and proves that just because you’re a handless coffee cup, doesn’t mean you can’t follow your dreams! Yes, you may have to pretend like you’re a marshmallow to make your dreams happen, but they can happen! Believe it or not, that dead coffee cup isn’t the true star of that gorgeous cover art.

It goes without saying, but the only star of that cover is the howling wolf!

Once upon a time, a t-shirt on Amazon spread magic and wonder all over the internet and changed lives. It cleared up my allergies, melted away every pimple on my face, and it’s beauty was so powerful that it detached my retina (yes, it took 8 years to detach, but it definitely detached because of the Three Wolf Moon t-shirt).

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I’ve been waiting for an Oprah: Where Are They Now? about the three wolves of the Three Wolf Moon t-shirt. They’ve been laying pretty low since they ruled the internet and TV in 2009. My guess is that after turning down starring roles in the Twilight sequels (because their dignity is obviously very important to them) and other multi-million dollars offers, they retired to a rural farm where they could howl at the moon without the paparazzi bothering them. But it looks like one of them has broken away from the group, gone solo and made Selena Gomez the luckiest trick alive by agreeing to pose for her little cover art.

There’s a good reason for why Selena’s cover art for Wolves looks like a logo for a Twihard’s fan appreciation Tumblr page done by a graphic art student dropout using a bootleg copy of MS Paint. They obviously spent the entire budget on the One Wolf Moon’s fee. And it was worth every coin.

Pics: @SelenaGomez, Amazon

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