Archives: September 2017

Birthday Sluts

September 26, 2017 / Posted by:

Olivia Newton-John (69)
Lilly Singh (29)
Meghan King Edmonds (33)
Nev Schulman (33)
Jessie Pavelka (35)
Christina Milian (36)
Serena Williams (36)
Kelly Dodd (42)
Jake Paltrow (42)
Dr. Luke (44)
Shawn Stockman of Boyz II Men (45)
Sheri Moon Zombie (47)
James Caviezel (49)
Ben Shenkman (49)
Jillian Barberie (51)
Jill Soloway (52)
Nicki French (53)
Melissa Sue Anderson (55)
Tracey Thorn (55)
Cindy Herron (56)
Linda Hamilton (61)
Mary Beth Hurt (71)
Bryan Ferry (72)
Anne Robinson (73)
Kent McCord (75)
Jonathan Goldsmith (79)
Winnie Mandela (81)
Philip Bosco (87)

Pic: People

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Night Crumbs

September 25, 2017 / Posted by:

Cindy Crawford’s daughter Kaia Gerber is the new IT girl of the fashion world, and yes this is nepotism at work again, but is it so bad if it makes Kendall Jenner and the Hadids seethe so hard that it causes them to actually make a different face? – Lainey Gossip

The look IS Hea Deville (I don’t know her either) giving you goth stripper vampire, or Bella Thorne at a funeral – Drunken Stepfather

Actually, I take that second one back. This is what Bella Thorne would wear to a funeral – Hollywood Tuna

Colin Firth made a good decision by getting dual citizenship, and his wife really, really made a good decision by wearing a dress that Endora would wear to her quinceañera – Celebitchy

Teen Mom Jenelle’s new husband ran his mouth to Radar right before their wedding. So yeah, I’m sure those two wrecks will be divorced as soon as Radar offers her husband the right amount for the exclusive divorce news  (tomorrow) – Reality Tea

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Megyn Kelly Didn’t Exactly Have A Smooth First (To)Day

September 25, 2017 / Posted by:

When Megyn Kelly announced she was jumping off the Fox News ship for more mainstream NBC, she likely hoped it would be a swan dive from her high “Santa just is white!” platform into cooking demonstrations and free liquor thanks to her timeslot butt-bumping against the fourth hour of Today with Kathie Lee Gifford and Hoda Kotb. Day one is over, and it seems like it was more like a belly flop. Continue reading

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Lena Dunham Says Her Friends Were Triggered By Kylie Jenner’s Pregnancy News

September 25, 2017 / Posted by:

When you first heard the news that 20-year-old Kylie Jenner is knocked up, how did you react? Did you scream? Did you shudder? Did you e-mail your resume to every Calabasas-based child care agency in hopes you’ll score a lucrative million-dollar contract as one of the nannies who will inevitably raise Kylie’s kid after she gets bored with it? Did you feel extremely triggered. If it’s the last one, you’re probably one of Lena Dunham’s friends.

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George Clooney Shits On Trump Who Shit On The Hollywood Elite

September 25, 2017 / Posted by:

It’s mirrored shitting! It would be easy to take a dump on George Clooney’s “man of the people” claim considering he gets to boink one of the world’s top humanitarian lawyers in a palatial Lake Como estate while he awaits that up to $1 billion Casamigos payment to get divvied up. But you shouldn’t! The Daily Beast landed an interview with Ocean sans the 11, and he’s here to tell Donald Trump and his cronies to back the F up on telling “coastal elites” to shut up. They’re the elite ones! Continue reading

Prince Hot Ginge and Future Princess Meghan Make It Official With A Hand-Hold 

September 25, 2017 / Posted by:

And I’ve made my official place on a suicide watch list somewhere.

Even though Prince Hot Ginge publicly defended his girlfriend Meghan Markle against racist gross shit, and she was on a 100% Kensington Palace-approved cover of Vanity Fair, and they’ve been photographed everywhere together, some crazy bitches in denial (Why is everyone looking at me?) thought that maybe just maybe, they wouldn’t get engaged and he’d realize that he has a duty to the people. He has a duty to remain single so that the delusional, hard-up whores out there (You’re doing it again, you’re looking at me) think that they have an actual chance with a straight British prince who doesn’t even know or care that they’ve alive. But it looks like the engagement ring necklace (aka a copper-colored cock ring I wear around my neck) that Prince Hot Ginge (aka a PHG cuddle pillow) gave me will soon mean nothing, because these two are totally getting engaged now that they’ve made their official hand-holding official debut at an official event! Let me say official just one more time…

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