Teresa Giudice Might Be Done With Juicy Joe

August 23, 2017 / Posted by:

Joe Giudice is known these days less as Juicy Joe and more like Inmate “Don’t I Know Him From Somewhere?“, and Teresa Giudice might be over that whole attentive wife BS. UsWeekly seems to think Teresa is so over Joe, she’s thinking of flipping the table on their marriage (ie. calling it quits).

A source tells UsWeekly that once Joe was in the clink, Teresa was all about keeping her kids busy and fuggheddingabouthim while he was away.

“Teresa keeps them busy so they’re distracted. They have adjusted to life without Dad in the house.”

Teresa and the kids have adjusted so much that they’ve only visited Juicy J a couple of times since it became his turn in the husband-wife prison relay. Teresa wrapped up an 11-month stint in jail in December 2015.

Anyone who watches Real Housewive of New Jersey has limited hearing because that litter has a particular high-pitched screech than the general housewife populace. They also know Teresa’s main plot is being the subservient wife who occasionally dabbles in furniture flipping. But ever since doing hard time, she’s realized she don’t need no man! She has her hand! I don’t actually know if she recognized the second part. But, her mom passed away recently, and Teresa made it through that sans Joe, and it apparently has her mind working:

“Teresa’s still standing. She’s learned she doesn’t need Joe.”

She’s also taken Melissa Gorga’s sprinkle cookies off her eyes and maybe actually watched some of the playback of her own show. It’s pretty clear Joe’s peen has conquered Italy in ways Caesar only dreamed of. Teresa has followed her man around for years like a Pomeranian (and yapping like one, too), believing him each time he said that he would never leave their onyx and marble palace for some pedestrian Jersey Turnpike twat. If you’ve ever watched Joe stumble around their kitchen like a lobotomized elephant trying to make its way through a maze, you’d probably believe him, too! Only now, Teresa thinks one of his lady friend is more like a lady tramp:

“‘He’s always said this particular person was just a friend,” says the source, “but now Teresa thinks there’s more to the relationship.”

I dunno what’s in the Federal penitentiary’s water, but this bitch is suddenly enlightened like she just had a good chat with the Oracle at Delphi. Joe’s done with his sentence sometime in 2019, but he could then get deported back to Italy. Teresa probably looks at that and is done with his trifling shit. That’s a long time to go without putting a creamy cannoli in your mouth, even if it does find its way to other bakeries from time to time.

Pic: UsWeekly

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