Hot Slut Of The Day!

August 12, 2017 / Posted by:

The wiggling dick hair tie! 

Not since the scrunchie or the banana clip, has there been such a simple and tasteful hair tool that lets everyone know that you’re both practical and appreciate classic style. Reader Kelly stuck this tip into my inbox that was posted on Instagram by stylist Sheff Pavel, and there’s not much to say about it (because it’s kind of hard to type words while you’re licking the screen). If you don’t have time to fuck with your hair, just put it into a ponytail with help from the gorgeous peen and huevos hair tie (which is fitting since that thing is hung like a pony) and wear it with pride. It’s also the perfect thing to wear if you want to tell the world that you’ve always got dick on the brain, or in this case, dick on the hair.

These wiggling dick ties can be bought on eBay, and I’m sure they’re also for sale in the Scientology Celebrity Centre’s bathhouse salon. Sure this hair tie makes Shia LaBeouf as hung as Jon Hamm, but I’d still chase it down the street with mouth wide open. Size queen: I ain’t.

And this reminds me of Coco Chanel’s (more like Cocko Chanel’s) most famous quote: “Before leaving the house, a lady should look in the mirror and put on a pink dick hair accessory.”

Pic: Instagram

SHARE
Our commenting rules are pretty simple: If you make any overly offensive comment (racist, bigoted, etc..) or go way off topic when not in an Open Post, your comments will be deleted and you will be banned. If you see an offensive or spammy comment you think should be deleted, flag it for the mods and they'll be forever grateful and give you their first born (although, you probably don't want that).

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >