As we’ve seen over and over again, Mariah Carey hasn’t necessarily been giving 100% in her performances of late. I’d clock her at somewhere around 2%. Given that breathing and sustaining a pulse are autonomic nervous system functions, the additional 2% effort is basically just enough for her to remain upright with her eyes mostly open. Sad to say, the old rhinestoned mare ain’t what she used to be. Well, Complex has a theory about what might be at the root of Mariah’s less than stellar performances and it’s not because somebody has been slipping her quaaludes; she fired her longtime choreographer Anthony Burrell.
So what happened? As it turns out, there might be a pretty simple reason for the change in Mariah’s recent shows. In January, almost immediately after the New Year’s Eve fiasco, Mariah fired Anthony Burrell, her now-former choreographer and creative director.
Does that mean that her new dance captain has been showing Mimi videos of psychologically wounded elephants trapped in inappropriately small enclosures at unregulated foreign zoos and telling her “just do that”? No, according to Anthony (who is shady AF), it takes more than just dance moves to get Mariah moving. Anthony said:
“Working with an artist like Mariah, who’s not a mover first, it’s always a challenge to get them to think physically and not just vocally. You always have to keep in mind that they’re a singer first. The priority is not teaching them 100 counts of 8, or endless routines. I wanted to give Mariah a modern push to revamp her, give her a fresher, more modern feel, make her more aware of her body and her lines, and not look like her feet hurt when she’s walking.”
You see, Mimi’s not a “mover” nor has she ever been. To hear Anthony tell it, Mariah needed him to push her and give her simple moves that she could execute with ease. He thinks her new team are too green and inexperienced to know how to get her to move her lazy ass. Anthony went on:
“You’re a legend. But you don’t care, your team doesn’t care. They’re not guiding and directing her. She’s back to where she was before. It’s not like she’s never looked this bad before; I just stepped her game up.”
Need proof that she was always a garbage dancer? Here’s a side by side comparison of yesteryear Mimi (tipsy cousin doing the electric slide at a wedding) and today Mimi (senile grandmother who woke up on a stage surrounded by sailors and just went with it).
“It’s just typical Mariah. Mariah is clear: when she doesn’t wanna do something, she doesn’t do it. She’s performing with lackluster and no fucks given, and it’s taking away her star.”
Why don’t you say what you really, mean Anthony!? I think Anthony is the one with no fucks to give. He’s moved on to dancing and doing choreography for Parkwood Entertainment, which is Beyonce’s crew. Meanwhile, Mimi is currently a “very special guest” on Lionel Richie‘s All The Hits tour. Hopefully somebody in Lionel’s crew has rigged her Spanx with a little something that can give her periodic zaps to keep her on her toes. Or at the very least on her feet.