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The enema penguin from Japan!
Oh, Japan, continues to be a wonderful wonderland of pure and potent foolery where if you get the hard shits from eating fried chicken covered with girl singer sweat sauce, you can relieve your bowels by sticking a happy pink penguin up your culo. RocketNews24 says that last week, Ichijiku Pharmaceutical Company debuted a new mascot, which people dealing with constipation can really get behind, because that’s a big ole’ happy enema. That mascot is a wet dream come true for Plushies with an enema fetish.
Ichijiku’s new penguin enema (penema or eneguin?) mascot is named Kan-chan, and the Japanese word for enema is “kancho,” so yeah, that’s a pink enema creature who actually looks excited and happy to be shoved up your caca-stuffed ass. But Ichijiku decided to play dumb and say that Kan-chan isn’t the butt baby of an enema and a Lisa Frank penguin, but is actually just a penguin wearing some kind of hair accessory.
However, while our eyes tell us that Kan-chan is obviously an anthropomorphized enema, the company insists she’s actually a penguin, and that what looks like an enema cap on the top of her head is actually a hair accessory. It’s a pretty flimsy denial, though, seeing as how Kan-chan isn’t shaped anything at all like a penguin above her eyes.
Ichijiku obviously needs to use one of their own enemas on themselves so they can get rid of the bullshit. Because Kan-chan looks exactly like one of their kanchos. If Kan-chan spotted one of these enemas, she’d totally run up to it and ask, “Are you my mommy?”
But you know, Ichijiku trying to pass off their enema mascot for a pink penguin in a weird hair thing should give bottoms an idea. The next time you’re about to have butt sex with your piece and need to excuse yourself to clean your ass out, just say, “I’ll be right back, I need to stick a smiling pink penguin up my b-hole.” That sounds a lot more charming and cutesy than, “I’ll be right back, I need to douche my ass with an enema.”
Pics: Rakuten Global Market, @ichijikuseiyaku