Blac Chyna Is The Real MVP

August 4, 2017 / Posted by:

And by “MVP” I of course mean Most Valuable Pole-dancer. It wasn’t that long ago when we all rolled our eyes at the torture porn that was Blac Chyna and Rob Kardashian’s attention fueled relationship (brought to you by the letters P, M and K). Fortunately for us all, that shit came to an end last month. However, they still have a child to raise for another two decades. And when it comes to eight-month-old Dream, Rob. You ARE the father (that makes less money).

TMZ reports that Rob and Chyna are settling their custody negotiations and SURPRISE! Chyna is the parent that makes it rain while Rob is making it spritz. As of right now, neither of them is seeking child support, but in the event that happens, Rob better hope Chyna has forgiven him for that tirade he went on where he basically called his child’s mother a gutter snipe, gold digging whore. Sources tell TMZ:

…neither Rob nor BC has requested child support from the other … yet. If that changes though, Rob would likely be the one asking for a couple of reasons. First, Rob has Dream more often than Chyna — we’re told that’s always been the case. Second, she makes way more money than he does. We’re told Rob banks very little on his own outside of the family reality show.

If child support does in fact come into play, Chyna will probably cut Rob a check and then make him cash it so he can throw money at her onstage while she’s hosting gigs at strip joints, which is one way she’s been supplementing her loss of the Kardashian Kash.

And now aside from poppin’ that ass on stage and in videos, Chyna’s ready to spit that hot shit on wax as well. Inspired by the queen of flotation device-sized asses Nicki Minaj, TMZ also reports that Chyna is ready to add emcee to her ever-growing list of occupations.

Several sources close to Blac Chyna tell us she’s entering the music game and is already recording in the studio. As for what type of music … rap, “poetry music” and traditional singing. The catalyst was the Yo Gotti music video shoot down in Miami a couple weeks back with Nicki, who Chyna sees as a mentor. The next step is to get signed.

Damn Rob! You better step your pussy up and get this money! You can’t count on Chyna to be somersaulting around that pole and pimping out fake lashes forever, mutha fucka. And once she becomes a Grammy award winning rapper (she won’t), she’ll go completely MIA and become the first female deadbeat dad in history. Whatever happened to all those wacky ass socks you had back in the day, bruh? Hopefully you haven’t turned all of them into home made Fleshjacks just yet. I tell y’all, these two should have never procreated. I’m just too sure little Dream’s first words will be “Fuck This Shit!” as she grabs her bottle and bolts for the front door.

Pic: WENN

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