Hot Slut Of The Day!

July 21, 2017 / Posted by:

The First Lady of Japan, Akie Abe, who became the First Lady of Our Hearts when she shaded Donald Trump by pretending to not know English, and yes, I’m choosing to 100% believe that story even though those fun-killing haters at The Washington Post wrote a buzz-murdering piece titled: “Why Japan’s first lady was probably not snubbing President Trump.”

Shut up, Washington Post, just let me look at that above picture of Lady Akie and believe she’s saying, “I know English, but I don’t how to speak Asshole, so I’m not talking to that bitch.”

By now, you have probably already bowed down to your new hero and shade master: First Lady Akie Abe! Trump did yet another insane interview with The New York Times (via People), and during it, he said that he sat next to First Lady Akie at this year’s G20 Summit and that during the almost 2 hour dinner, she didn’t talk to him since he says she knows zero English words.

ladyakie2017

But then the internet pulled out a clip from 2014 of First Lady Akie speaking English at an event in NYC. So basically, First Lady Akie may have done what my auntie does whenever a bill collector calls her. She pulled a “No English” on a bitch. Hmmm… maybe First Lady Akie decided she didn’t know English after Trump looked at her and said, “Why aren’t you wearing that white makeup on your face? And why aren’t you offering me tea and giggling with your hand over your mouth and calling me Mister Donald?

The Washington Post says that Akie Abe went to the English-speaking International School of the Sacred Heart in Tokyo from kindergarten through high school, so she definitely knows more than zero English words and I’m definitely sure she knows more English words than Trump does. The Washington Post thinks she just stayed quiet because she didn’t want to misspeak. More like the miss didn’t want to speak to Trump.

And in my head, someone else at the table spoke Japanese and Lady Akie said to them, “Can you believe they sat me next to this motherfucker? Remind me to curse out the trick in charge of the seating arrangements because this some bullshit.”

Oh, Lady Akie, you are all of us.

Pic: AP

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