China Tells Justin Bieber, “Boi, Bai!”

July 21, 2017 / Posted by:

It’s a real bitch to basic betches from the U.S., when they visit the Great Wall of China and can’t post some pseudo-offensive photo to Facebook, pretending to be a samurai, because it’s banned. Well, now they can’t even pair their trip to Shanghai with a Justin Bieber concert where he refuses to sing his songs, because he’s viewed as just as much of a cultural threat as that “poke” button! China has likely been disgraced by him since they thought he looked too much like a P.F. Chang’s menu in his outfit (pictured above) to the 2015 Met Gala “China: Through The Looking Glass.”

Some brave soul confronted the government on the Beijing cultural bureau’s website, wondering why they had to schlep it out of the country if they planned on seeing the Biebz, and Page Six said China responded with the receipts:

“We sympathize with your feelings. Justin Bieber is a talented singer but is also a controversial young foreign idol. We understand that there are records of his bad behavior, whether it is in his private life abroad or on stage…”

China has been pretty lukewarm to music acts from the west, and it’s only been in the last decade where select musical acts like Beyoncé were let in (and that was before she was talking about getting Monica Lewinsky-ed all over her gown!)… the country prefers its western nights to only involve Chili’s and an edgy performance by Kenny G (throw in a charcoal mask, and you have my Friday!). The culture police added that the move (believed to be temporary) was necessary to purify China’s entertainment industry and would be lifted if Justin cleaned up his act. Ha! That’ll happen about as soon as Chip and Joanna Gaines start preaching the word of Satan right as they do the big reveal on Fixer Upper!

As for what may have sparked the ban, the Biebz previously visited China in 2013, and he channeled the dark lady lord spirit of Anna Wintour by having his body guards carry him to the top. Sources say the whole thing was viewed as offensive. So rather than go on a talk show and giggle and gossip about it like Tim Gunn, the country decided to wash their hands clean of Canada’s black swan (don’t even ask who the white swan is! YOU KNOW!). I just think we need to call a spade a spade here: China just doesn’t want to get stuck tending to a member of Bieber’s menagerie of animals. He has no problem leaving them behind!


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