Ben Affleck and his new lady (or old lady, depending on how long you believe they’ve been hooking up) SNL producer Lindsay Shookus were spotted on a date night last night in Los Angeles. They look so happy! I’ve never seen two people more thrilled about getting papped with doggy bags and to-go cups of…what is that, 18 shots of espresso cut with liquid weed? It must be – I mean, look how damn buzzed they look. But it isn’t all red-faced smiles for Lindsay. According to People, shit is really awkward between Lindsay and Ben’s ex-wife Jennifer Garner.
Yesterday we found out that Jennifer has gone into “mama bear mode” since Ben introduced a new lady into his life. Apparently once aspect of mama bear mode involves tracking down said new lady (follow the scent of homewrecker) and growling like an angry grizzly. Sources say that after Jennifer found out about Ben and Lindsay’s alleged affair in 2015, Jennifer confronted Lindsay in person during a trip to New York City. They don’t say how that confrontation went, but I pictured Jennifer kicking down the doors at Studio 8H, grabbing Kyle Mooney by the collar, and hissing “Where is sheeeeeeeee.”
One source claims that after the confrontation, Lindsay “refused to back down or quit the affair.” They never did hug and make up. A source close to Lindsay says:
“Jennifer and Lindsay do not have any relationship.”
Jennifer, acting like a scorned T-1000, eventually tracked down Lindsay’s ex-husband Kevin Miller after appearing on an episode of Late Night with Seth Meyers (where Kevin is a producer). A source says she showed him “proof” of the affair in the form of text messages. Although Kevin and Lindsay had already split up at that time.
How Jennifer Garner got text messages, I don’t know. But I’m starting to think Jennifer is more diabolical than her sweet little church-going mom image lets on. Those sources don’t say if Jennifer has moved on to a better place, emotionally – but if she wants to ease into it, might I suggest a pit stop in Petty Revenge Valley. Like, maybe if she’s feeling a little low she could call up her pals at Capital One with Lindsay’s mailing address and ask them to pre-approve her (and every possible spelling of her name) for at least 200 cards. Congratulations, Linzee Shookums!