Last week, Barstool Sports got in trouble after one of their writers, Chris Spagnuolo, posted a piece titled: Is Rihanna Going To Make Being Fat The Hot New Trend?. In it, Chris joked (a term I’m using very loosely here) that Rihanna looked like she was wearing a sumo suit, and hoped that her new look would inspire hot girls to “look like the humans in Wall-E.”
— UNCLE D (@DeeDub67) May 31, 2017
It didn’t go over well, and Chris Spagnuolo claimed he was getting cyberbullied by Rihanna’s fans. He has since been suspended indefinitely, and the post has been deleted. Although the blog’s founder released a statement saying it was pulled because it wasn’t funny enough.
Now, we all know that if Rihanna is in the right mood, she will drag a bitch. But she must have either been feeling merciful or figured her fans were doing a good enough job, because she didn’t really come for Chris Spagnuolo. Instead, she Instagrammed a meme about herself featuring Gucci Mane and a play on every basic girl’s favorite inspirational Marilyn Monroe quote.
I love any time that Rihanna slaps back at someone. The thing is though, that meme is a bit incorrect for more than just the reason that current-day Rihanna looks NOTHING like former Gucci Mane. I bet if you took a quick poll of straight guys and lesbians, there would be a sizeable number that would raise their hands and enthusiastically volunteer to take on Rihanna at her 2007 Gucci Mane, her 2017 Gucci Mane, and her 2011 Gucci Mane. (That would be the year he got an electric ice cream cone tattooed on the side of his face). Yes, they might cringe a little at the thought of doing someone with a terrible face tattoo. But as long as it was attached to Rihanna, they’d no doubt be willing to pretend it wasn’t there. Hey, I’m sure some of us have excused a lot worse for a lot less sexy.