Hot Slut Of The Day! 

May 30, 2017 / Posted by:

Billina, Dorothy’s talking chicken who saves EVERYONE in Return to Oz!

Toto is the friend (and pet) of Dorothy who gets all of the attention, and yes, he sometimes proves that he’s not just a pretty face. But did Toto lay an egg that was used to destroy the evil monsters who were trying to get at Dorothy? I think not.

Billina is one of Dorothy’s pets from Kansas and she was originally named “Bill,” because when she first hatched, no one knew if she was going to be a lady chicken or a dude chicken. L. Frank Baum’s acid trip facotry of a brain decided that for the third book, Ozma of Oz, in the Oz series, Dorothy needed the help of a talking chicken.

Billina made her book debut in Ozma of Oz, and she made her feature film debut in 1985’s Return to Oz, the creepy fuckery-filled masterpiece that made parents wonder if they were having another LSD flashback and made kids wonder if they’d ever sleep again. In Return to Oz, an Emo Dorothy gets sent to the looney bin and right before an evil psychiatrist is about to really mess her up with electroshock therapy, a storm hits and she escapes and ends up in a chicken coop. Dorothy wakes up with Billina by her side and Billina can magically talk (voice artiste Denise Bryer did the voice for Billina). Dorothy is back in Oz and replacing Toto as her sidekick is Billina. Billina was already a sassy bitch when she couldn’t talk human, and she really becomes a sassy bitch when she gets a human voice. It’s as if a character from Mama’s Family was transformed into an animatronic chicken.

To make a long weird, jacked-up story short, Billina helps to destroy the Nomes, who have been instructed by the Nome King to get Dorothy. Chicken eggs are a Nomes kryptonite, so Billina lays an egg and it ends up in the Nome King’s mouth, which causes his demise. Vegans truly don’t have shit on the Nomes.

Dorothy goes back to Kansas, but Billina ends up staying in Oz. She shows up in several other Oz books. If Hollywood ever decides to reboot Return to Oz (which they will since they hate us), I will be one hundred percent okay with it as long as they cast the only actress capable of taking on the important role of Billina. I’m talking about the one and only Chicken Cutlets, of course!

Pic: Walt Disney Pictures/Biff Bam Pop! (For Lahoma)

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