CBS brought the axe down on Two Broke Girls after six seasons, according to TVLine. It’s a shame (for fans of that show and fans of legendary and ageless divas who hate Donald Trump), because they were in talks with Cher to play the mom of Kat Dennings’ character, Max. I only watched that show a couple of times, but it had some truly filthy one-liners, especially for network television. I always wondered if any leftover CBS fan oldies from the Murder She Wrote days ever stumbled upon that show and immediately died from clutching pearls too fast.
The “Max’s mom” character was described as “incredibly charming and very street smart.” She was supposed to pop up in the sixth season finale (now the series finale), but “casting issues” prevented them from introducing her. I’m sure “casting issues” really means “Cher was too busy shading hammerheads on Twitter to look at the script!” via TVLine:
Exec producer Michelle Nader confirmed to TVLine at the time that casting issues forced them to delay her arrival. “We didn’t find the right person. We’ve waited a long time to [meet her], so it’s got to be somebody amazing.”
The talks with Cher were “very preliminary.” I’m assuming it went something like this:
Producer Michelle: Hi, Cher, this is Michelle? I produce 2 Broke Girls on CBS…
Cher: How did you get this number?
Producer Michelle: Er, your son Chaz?
Cher: (to herself) He’s obviously still pissed at me for not paying for his top surgery. (to Producer Michelle) Who? What?
Producer Michelle: You know, they’re waitresses and they make cupcakes and jokes about sluts?
Cher: I only watch PBS and Sister Wives.
Producer: Well, I can send you a screener. You would be playing our main character’s mother. She’s charming and street-smart…
Cher: Do you have five million? You know I’m Cher, right? I only did Will & Grace because my fans were into it.
2 Broke Girls: Well, no, we are “broke.” *nervous laughter*
Cher: Cher doesn’t roll out of her hyperbaric chamber for any less than that. I’m Cher, bitch! Fuck off. *click*
Cher is very busy. The show ended with Max getting engaged, and the producers say they planned for a seventh season. But unfortunately, Warner Bros. isn’t shopping the show around to other networks.
Kat Dennings put up a goodbye to their fans on Instagram.
This means very little. Nothing remains cancelled nowadays (except Firefly *sob*). Give it a month or two, or get Ryan Seacrest involved.