In “Riveting News From 2001” News, The Hollywood Reporter posted excerpts from a biography about Sherry Lansing where she talks about how much the saint formerly known as just Angelina Jolie wanted to star in the movie version of Tomb Raider. Sherry was CEO of Paramount Pictures at the time that Tomb Raider was being made and says that the producers and other executives were worried that Angie would fuck the movie up. Angie wanted it so badly that she offered to be drug tested every single day. “Oh so THAT’S where her ass got the idea from,” said Brad Pitt as he softly stroked his trusty former friend, his bong, while remembering the good times they had together.
In Leading Lady, which was written by Stephen Galloway, Sherry says that back during Angie’s pre-halo days, the producers of Tomb Raider and the other executives were nervous about casting her as the lead-role in a big-budget movie since she had a reputation of being a brother-kissing, blood vial-wearing, bad shit-doing wild mess. Director Simon West thought that Angie’s “dark reputation” worked for the character, but Sherry wasn’t so sure.
Sherry says that when word got around that they were considering a then 24-year-old Angie to be Lara Croft, Jon Voight and family friend Jane Fonda called her to warn her about how “fragile” Angie was. Simon ended up flying to Mexico, where Angie was shooting Original Sin, and it was there where she offered to piss, spit and bleed into a cup to prove that she was drug-free. Paramount took her up on her offer.
Sherry says that during negotiations, Angie was randomly drug-tested two kinds of ways. They made her piss in a cup and also took her blood. She got an A+ on those tests, but the studio still didn’t trust her. They hired Bobby Klein, a drug management coach and therapist of sorts, to be her support on set and follow her around. Meanwhile, the likes of Johnny Depp can probably do a line off of a hooker’s puss in between takes on set and nobody says shit.
Working with Bobby Klein apparently ended up being as pleasant as getting a rim job from a piranha. Lloyd Levin, a producer on Tomb Rider, says Bobby wanted to be a part of Angie’s training and wanted her to do what he thinks was spiritual nonsense:
“[The expert] wanted her to have milk baths and started talking about yoga and meditation and wanted to be the point person in charge of Angelina’s training. It was just this bullshit. It seemed like spiritual hokum.”
Bobby ended up getting pink-slipped after Simon West’s assistant accused him of sexual harassment.
Filming ended without Angie going wild, like getting arrested after choking out a monkey in a heroin-fueled rage while filming in the jungles of Cambodia. The first Tomb Raider movie went on to make almost $275 million worldwide and helped turn Angie into a bright shining A-LIST STAH!
So Angie had to get randomly drug tested and get followed around by some annoying dude who made her do yoga, meditation and soak in leche? She’s crazy and whoever was advising her at the time didn’t know shit. Her agents and managers should’ve known that she held the cards and said to Paramount, “Listen, what Angelina Jolie says goes, because she’s the star of the soon-to-be cinematic masterpiece spectacular Original Sin!”
And I know this BREAKING NEWS story from 2001 is more-than-exciting on its own, but I’m going to really knock you over by posting these old pictures from the Westwood premiere of Tomb Raider on June 11, 2001. Get into their early-aughts fashions and eyebrow situations. And yes, I’m sure Angie, Jessica Alba and Nelly Furtado’s belly buttons sang I’m Coming Out at the same time.