After being engaged for what felt like forever (2015, truly simpler times), Dave Franco and Alison Brie have gotten married. Dave and Alison seem kind of private, so it’s not like they were going to leap onto the cover of People with a headline screaming “OUR MARRIAGE JOY! 14-picture wedding album inside.” No, instead reps for Dave and Alison simply confirmed that they got married and that’s it.
Dave talked about their future marriage to Entertainment Tonight last June, and he made it seem like neither of them are big on wedding traditions or formality. They’re both sort of goofy people as well, so I really want to believe that Dave showed up to his wedding shirtless and covered in oil, and Alison walked down the aisle in a white lace version of her GLOW leotard.
But what’s really important is the role Dave’s brother James Franco played in the wedding. I’m sure that while Dave and Alison were casually shrugging about their wedding (“Crab puffs? Eh, sure“), James had a 30-point plan of high-art attention-grabbing and spotlight-stealing. Did James slip the wedding officiant a greasy $100 and perform the ceremony in Tommy Wiseau drag? Did James sing a trap version of At Last as a character called Etta James Franco? I’m sure we’ll have all those answers and more at the premiere of James’ next experimental art film, Wedding Cake Fuckers (Yes I Tried to Fuck the Cake).