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March 2, 2017 / Posted by:

Butterfinger Milk!

On the internet, I can easily find pictures of a cat front-hugging a rat with love, Kunty Karl without his glasses on and an Olsen smiling with teeth, but I cannot find a picture of the nutritious breakfast meal in a glass from the 90s: Butterfinger Milk! It existed¬†for real, though, and this article from The Chicago Tribune proves it! It wasn’t a disgustingly delicious-sounding leche that only existed in my mind.

Butterfinger Milk sort of sounds like the name of something you’d get while anal finger banging and I’m just going to leave it at that, because it’s wrong to ruin the memory of Butterfinger Milk with my filth. That Chicago Tribune article says that in the early 90s, statistics showed that 5 percent of milk sales were for flavored milks, so Nestle, who already had Quik, tried to get another piece of those sales by squirting out Butterfinger Milk. Nestle released it in 1993 and it doesn’t look like it lived to see 1997.

Before shooting out Butterfinger Milk to the public, Nestle tested it and it was a hit. But in 1993, one retailer said that its customers weren’t running to guzzle it down.

One IGA retailer in the Phoenix market describing it as “doing okay so far (after three weeks) but consumers may treat it as a novelty.”

A novelty it was, because it’s gone now. So Butterfinger Milk is something that was only enjoyed in the 90s, and unless Nestle re-releases it, no one will ever have it again. You could try making it yourself at home, but that sounds like a lot of work. Do you know how many Butterfingers you’d have to milk just to get one goddamn glass?

Pics: Nestle, Clipartfest, Recycle Nation

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