Denzel Washington’s Face Says It All

February 27, 2017 / Posted by:

And so does the face on the guy behind Denzel Washington.

When Casey Affleck won the Best Actor Oscar last night, a huge chunk of the audience stood up for him. Mel Gibson was probably thinking to himself, “Oh, sure, I get blacklisted from Hollywood for years for hating Jews, terrorizing women and being an overall demon piece of shit and yet you stand up for Casey Affleck’s creeper ass?” Actually, Mel Gibson would never think that. Mad Mel’s not that self-aware.

Casey Affleck beat Denzel, Ryan Gosling, Viggo Mortensen and Andrew Garfield in the Best Actor category for his performance as a sadling, who always looks like he has to piss, in Manchester By The Sea. When the human form of a clump of hair found in the drain of a public beach shower got on stage to accept his Oscar, he should’ve thanked the lips of Matt Damon and his brother Ben Affleck for kissing so much Academy ass to get him that award. Casey didn’t do that, but he did thank fellow nominee Denzel Washington for “teaching” him how to act. The not-amused look that covered Denzel Washington’s face was perfect. Denzel’s look was a cross between “bitch, shut up” and “bitch, give me that Oscar then if I taught you.” I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone roll their eyes with their mouth before.

At the Golden Globes, Brie Larson presented Casey Affleck with his award and while doing it, she looked about as thrilled as a cat at a dog orgy. And last night, some think that Brie made another “face” after saying Casey’s name.

I don’t know… It doesn’t look like Brie is exactly farting up rainbows and sparkles over announcing Casey’s name, but she doesn’t look as uncomfortable as she was at the Golden Globes. That hug was beyond forced, though, and the Academy should give her another Oscar for that. As well as a gift certificate to a good lice removal salon since I’m sure many of Casey’s dirt critters jumped on her body.

Also, during Casey’s speech, semi-professional awards show meme-maker, Chrissy Teigen, pretended to be asleep.

That’s what Brie Larson should’ve done. Right when she saw Casey Affleck’s name, she should’ve dropped to the stage and fell asleep Rusty the Narcoleptic Dog-style.

And here’s Brie at last night’s Oscars looking like the Salsa Dancer emoji going to a funeral, as well as pictures of Denzel, Casey and Brie at Vanity Fair’s party.

Pics: Wenn.com, ABC

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