Cheryl Officially “Announces” That She’s Pregnant With A One Direction Baby

Not that she needed to. I doubt anyone has been confusing her stomach situation with pizza bloat. But clearly Cheryl (formerly Cheryl Tweedy Cole Fernandez-Versini) was waiting for the right time and place to officially debut the fetus put inside her by One Direction’s Liam Payne. And that right place just so happened to be in a L’Oreal commercial.

Cheryl appeared with others, like Helen Mirren, in a campaign for L’Oreal Paris and The Prince’s Trust to promote self-esteem in young people. Cheryl doesn’t come right out and say “Yes, this here is a baby that was made with a load of One Direction sperm.” Because that would have killed the mood a little. But she does the whole cradling-my-bump-in-a-stretchy-top pose, which is the famous person equivalent to a positive reading on a piss stick.

I am proud to announce that I am one of fifteen ambassadors working with @PrincesTrust & LOreal Paris UK to help thousands of young people turn self-doubt into self-worth. The "All Worth It" Confidence training program starts now! Link in my bio?? #ALLWORTHIT #PRINCESTRUSTLOREAL

A post shared by Cheryl (@cherylofficial) on Feb 23, 2017 at 12:03am PST

And here’s the commercial that was shot. Bonus points to L’Oreal for including so much Helen Mirren. But negative points for not shooting an alternate commercial in which the whole thing is narrated by Cheryl in her amazing thick Geordie accent. “I’m worth it, me babeh worth it. Nip on it to ya local Superdrug for a wee bit of L’Oreal today, yeah?”

??https://t.co/CQbzcONrDr #allworthit ? pic.twitter.com/Tc3JsvA41X

— Cheryl (@CherylOfficial) February 23, 2017

I don’t know how well Cheryl’s appearance is going to help promote self-esteem. I have a feeling that upon seeing Cheryl show off her pregnant bump, thousands of Directioners dropped to their knees and cried “IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN MEEEEE!!!” and swearing to never leave the house again.

Pic: CherylOfficial