Pro-Scientology warrior turned anti-Scientology warrior, Leah Remini, was on Real Time with Bill Maher the other night to talk about the cult of crazies she used to belong to and promote Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath on A&E. While talking to Bill Maher, Leah said that Tom Cruise is the end all and be all of Scientology, so if he left, the Celebrity Centre would crumble, audit tapes would melt and John Travolta would be seen skipping while singing about how he’s free now.
Leah has made it clear before that Tommy Girl is the Jesus of Scientology. He’s Scientology’s Alien Prince, because he’s their most famous member and puts a lot of money into that bitch. On Real Time, Leah was talking about how Scientologists have to study a minimum of two and a half hours a day and Bill wondered if even Tommy has to do that. Leah said that he does, but well, if Tommy decided to make a rule stating that John Travolta has to do his daily studying for him, the head bitches of Scientology may go with it since he’s their little messiah!
Leah: Yes, not only does Tom Cruise do exactly that – Now, I don’t want you to get the idea that certain policies aren’t being bent for him, because they are. And that is the truth and that is part of the hypocrisy-
Bill: But he could end this. He could single-handedly, he is the one person.
Leah: Correct. Correct. And because they’re saying that he single-handedly is clearing the planet, is changing the planet.
Bill: The planet? He couldn’t even make Jack Reacher a hit.
Leah: Well Scientologists believe that he did. And Scientologists believe that if he didn’t make it a hit, it’s because there were suppressive evil people working against him, because he’s clearing the planet.
Tommy is never quitting Scientology, so it’ll either end when his spirit leaves his vessel for Mars (or wherever) or if he goes broke.
There are more than a million reasons for why being a Scientologist is shitty but having to suck on Tommy’s ass cheeks is up there on the list. You’d have to dig deep to pull out your inner Meryl Streep while lying after he asks you what you thought about his performance in Valkyrie. And then you’d have to resist the urge to bite your lips off when he asks you why your mouth isn’t planted firmly on his ass with the mouths of his other disciples.
And I bet Tommy knows that Scientology is nothing without him, and I bet he uses it. When he doesn’t get his way, he doesn’t have to throw a tantrum. He just threatens to leave and that makes David Miscavige fall at his feet, grab onto his ankles and beg him not to leave. Tom Cruise and David Miscavige are like your crazy, dysfunctional friend and her asshole boyfriend.