Archives: February 2017

Night Crumbs

February 20, 2017 / Posted by:

Jay-Z, Blue Ivy Carter and Beyonce all sat courtside at some basketball game last night. That thing on Beyonce that looks like Blanche Devereaux’s backup bedspread is actually a $22,000 Gucci kimono. It’s nice to know that Beyonce is just like us peasants, she too wears her cheapest outfit to a sports game, just in case she gets nacho cheese on it – Lainey Gossip

When Trump won, I wasn’t one of those people said that I’m moving to Canada. But now that I’ve read the rumor about Prince Hot Ginge spending more time in Toronto, I will say that I’m moving to Canada! – Celebitchy

Countess Luann is going for that EGOT, I see! She won a Grammy for Money Can’t Buy You Class, right? – Reality Tea

Charlotte McKinney’s suffocating chichis can’t take it anymore and are trying to escape out of her top – Drunken Stepfather

Ricky Martin met his hot big-tittied fiancé on Instagram  – Towleroad

In case you missed it, here’s the definition of random showing itself in the song that Selena Gomez and noted mumble crooner Vin Diesel did together – The Superficial

Ewww, James Woods, now is not the time to show us that you’ve got a foot fetish and want a piece of Patton Oswalt’s bare toes – Pajiba

I am totally into Hannah Jeter’s disco maternity wear – Popoholic

Bella Hadid brought her signature “mannequin in a coma” facial expressions to V MagazineThe Nip Slip

Frances Bean Cobain posted a letter to her dad on what would’ve been his 50th birthday – Popsugar

After falling during a show, David Cassidy says that he’s suffering from dementia and is retiring – Just Jared

RiRi’s ghost singer has been found! – Hollywood Tuna 

Abby Wambach and her Christian mommy blogger girlfriend got engaged – Boy Culture 

And after this day, what I really, really needed was a video of a baby porcupine nibbling on a piece of banana – OMG Blog

Pic: AP

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Open Post: Hosted By Angelina Jolie Eating A Tarantula

February 20, 2017 / Posted by:

In nearly every post about St. Angie Jolie, someone always says that trick needs to eat something. Well, she finally took that advice.

During that BBC interview in Cambodia where Angie said words (that her team probably spent 45 hours on writing for her) about the fall of Brangelina, she did a little cooking segment where she fried up some Cambodian delicacies. With help from three of her kids (Shiloh, Vivienne and Knox), Chef St. Dame Angie fried up some tarantulas, crickets and spiders and said that the first she time she gobbled down on bugs was when she visited Cambodia. After Knox chewed on a bug that his mom cooked up, he said that it tastes like  “flavorless chips.” It’s a good thing for Knox that he’s a chosen one, because if he wasn’t, he would’ve felt the wrath of God for hating on Chef St. Dame Angie’s cooking like that.

And something tells me Brad’s lawyer will show this footage during a custody hearing and say, “See, see, this proves that Angelina Jolie is a vicious black widow spider who eats men and her own kind!

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Lindsay Lohan Wants To Play The Little Mermaid

February 20, 2017 / Posted by:

Disney is doing live-action remakes of pretty much all their cartoon movies, because Mickey Mouse is a greedy money whore who knows that fools will throw their cash at anything with the Disney logo on it. Disney is working on a live-action The Little Mermaid, and over the weekend, Lindsay Lohan proved once again that’s she’s the corner where delusion and desperate meet when she said on Instagram that she wants be in it. No, LiLo doesn’t think she should play one of the polyps in Ursula’s garden of poor unfortunate souls. LiLo wants to be 16-year-old Ariel. You know, that idea isn’t that crazy. I mean, Ariel is a klepto and most of her body is covered with slimy scales.

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Tori Spelling’s $40,000 Baby Shower Pissed Off Dean McDermott’s Ex-Wife

February 20, 2017 / Posted by:

Tori Spelling is currently pregnant with her and Dean McDermott’s fifth child. Tori loves free shit and she loves to waste her mom’s money, so Candy Spelling threw her a huge, expensive baby shower on February 11th at the Bel Air Hotel. A source tells The Daily Mail that Candy dropped $40,000 on the baby shower, money that probably would have been better spent paying off one of Tori and The Deaner’s many debts. Or paying off Dean’s ex-wife Mary Jo Eustace.

Sources tell Page Six that Mary Jo was “livid” after she learned about the $40,000 baby shower. So livid she needed to zen-out in nature days after it happened, apparently.

Much needed calming walk.

A post shared by Mary Josephine Eustace (@maryjoeustace) on

Letting his mother-in-law throw a $40,000 baby shower might not have been the smoothest move; Dean reportedly owes Mary Jo thousands of dollars in unpaid child support for their 18-year-old son Jack. Mary Jo is taking The Deaner to court in Los Angeles next month.

Candy Spelling just spent $40,000 on Tori and The Deaner, and so I’m sure he’s going to hit her up for his latest child-related hand out. I bet he’s writing the email right now.

“Yo, whats’s up Candy Cane? Listen, The Deaner needs a financial favor from his favorite sugar grandmama. Turns out Daddy’s been a little greasy in the child support department. I figured since you’re already footing the bill for my other ones, you might help me out with the first one I made. If only The Deaner could get paid for making kids, amiright? PS – throw in a couple extra bucks for me? Taco Bell has this new fried chicken chalupa that I just can’t get enough of!”

Pic: Splash

The Sun Says That Tom Daley Regularly Cheated On His Fiancé With A Hot Model

February 20, 2017 / Posted by:

Last month, British diving twink, Tom Daley, learned the hard way (that’s not a pun, it looks like a semi-softie in the video) that sometimes when you send a trick a private Snapchat video of you touching your parts, that trick may leak it to the world. 22-year-old Tom said at the time that he did send a video to a fan on Snapchat, but he and his 42-year-old fiancé, Dustin Lance Black, were on a break at the time. Tom also said that he never met up with anyone and it’ll never happen again. But now here comes The Sun to say that Tom Daley shamelessly lied about not meeting up with dudes, because their source says he regularly did the butt-first dive onto a hot male model.

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Krime Scene Photos From Kim Kardashian’s Robbery Have Been Released

February 20, 2017 / Posted by:

Four months after Kim Kardashian was robbed at gunpoint in her apartment in Paris, several photos and a surveillance video of the night of the robbery have been released. The crime scene photos and surveillance video were released by French news channel TF1 yesterday. Google translate broke it all down into English for me, but it still made about as much sense as a note written by Kanye West. So I moved on over to TMZ‘s coverage of the story. They say the pictures show Kim’s bedroom, a roll of duct tape used to bind her, and what appears to be the piece used to gag her. There are also stills from the surveillance video which show the alleged robbers meeting at a cafe several times after the robbery.

I knew those alleged jewel heisters were old, but they look really old. That’s like Ocean’s Taking Eleven Different Pills for Arthritis old.

Video of the alleged robbers getting away on bikes was released shortly after the robbery, but now we know what they did after they got away. TF1 also aired a reenactment of the robbery, which sounds tacky and exploitative and I’m sure Kris Jenner loved it and requested a hundred copies of it.

The French report also states that the alleged thieves used code words and code names over the phone while discussing the robbery. They don’t say what Kim’s code name was. This is the information we need to know. Was it “Dame Derrière“? “Visage Plastique“? “L’Ancienne Assistante de Paris Hilton“?

Here’s Kim and Kanye going out for dinner on Saturday night in Los Angeles. Kim wore track pants and a fur coat (gotta stay loose and warm after your latest procedure), and Kanye wore a coat made from the wallpaper in your aunt’s powder room.

Pics: Splash

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