Archives: February 2017

The Oscars “In Memoriam” Segment Used A Picture Of Jan Chapman, Who Is Still Alive

February 27, 2017 / Posted by:

It looks like the Oscars and Dlisted share the same fact-checking agency (aka my sleeping dog who I think just farted and swallowed some barf at the same time. Talent!). Because they had a few giant fuck-ups last night. They botched Best Picture, and Leonardo DiCatchAHo accidentally said Emma Stone’s name instead of Isabelle Huppert’s while announcing the winner for Best Actress. The second one hasn’t been confirmed, but it will be. It will be!

Another grade 10 oops happened during the In Memoriam segment. The In Memoriam segment always ends up pissing people off, because they always leave a few artistes out. This year’s Oscars In Memoriam segment left out Garry Shandling, Robert Vaughn, Doris Roberts, Florence Henderson and Alexis Arquette. But this year, they fucked up in a brand, new way.

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The Accountants Took The Fall For That Best Picture Mess-Up

February 27, 2017 / Posted by:

You know that H&R Block is sliding their business card under the door of the offices of the Academy today.

Warren Beatty read the card, Faye Dunaway read the card and saids the words on it, but PricewaterhouseCoopers, the accounting firm who tallies up all the Oscar votes, is taking the blame for the biggest awkward shit bomb to hit the Oscars stage since… well… since last year when Stacey Dash broke everyone’s eye rolling muscle.

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Jimmy Kimmel Roasted Matt Damon All Night At The Oscars

February 27, 2017 / Posted by:

Jimmy Kimmel’s longest running joke is that he hates Matt Damon. It started years ago on Jimmy Kimmel Live! when he joked that Matt Damon had been bumped from the show for time, which eventually spawned 2008’s viral clap-back “I’m Fucking Matt Damon” and a special all-Matt episode in 2013 called Jimmy Kimmel Sucks!. Last night, Jimmy kept the joke going by poking ans scratching at Matt Damon pretty much every chance he got.

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Hot Sluts Of The Day!

February 27, 2017 / Posted by:

Gary From Chicago and his fiancee Vicki Vines!

Tip: If you’re ever on one of those tourist bus tours through Hollywood and they take you to a mysterious theater to see some kind of mysterious exhibit, make sure you’re in the front, because they may be taking your ass to the Oscars. And you’ll want to be in front so that you can get married by Denzel Washington, get a free pair of sunglasses from Jennifer Aniston and be the first to jack off Mahershala Ali’s Oscar.

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Birthday Sluts

February 27, 2017 / Posted by:

Grant Show (55)
JWoww (31)
Nicole Linkletter (32)
Kate Mara (34)
Josh Groban (36)
Chelsea Clinton (37)
Bobby V (37)
Peter Andre (44)
Li Bingbing (44)
Rozonda “Chilli” Thomas (46)
Donal Logue (51)
Noah Emmerich (52)
Adam Baldwin (55)
Johnny Van Zant (58)
Timothy Spall (60)
Neal Schon (63)
Debra Monk (68)
Ralph Nader (83)
Joanne Woodward (87)
Elizabeth Taylor (1932 – 2011)

Pic: TTT

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