Archives: January 2017

Kanye West And Justin Bieber Think The Grammys Are For The Dusty Out-Of-Touch Olds

January 31, 2017 / Posted by:

I learned that the Grammys were meaningless years ago when they failed to honor the musical artistry of the Spice Girls. How can I take a musical awards show seriously when they don’t give one nomination to the Beethoven, Mozart, Bach, Chopin and Vivaldi of our time? (Actually, that’s not a fair comparison. Beethoven and them never produced anything as artistic as “zig-a-zig-ah.“) Apparently, Kanye West and Justin Bieber have figured out that the Grammys are out-of-touch and will not grace the ceremony with their presence next month. Forget about the world crumbling into the gutter right now, the real reason why our cheeks are covered with tears today is because Kanye and The Biebs aren’t going to the Grammys. How will we ever find the strength to go on?

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Pharrell Williams’ Wife Gave Birth To Triplets

January 31, 2017 / Posted by:

Back in September, it was reported that Pharrell Williams was going to be a daddy for the second time. As it turns out, that report was incorrect. Vanity Fair says he recently became a daddy for the second, third, and fourth time. Pharrell’s wife Helen Lasichanh gave birth to triplets. Triplets! Poor Helen’s uterus. I bet every time Pharrell started singing Happy, her max-capacity uterus was like “Happy? Speak for yourself. I’m like a damn Puppy Surprise over here.

Pharrell’s rep tells Vanity Fair that Helen gave birth to their three-pack of babies earlier this month. His rep wouldn’t say anything else, like what they had, what they named them, or if they use Pharrell’s giant hat to carry them all around the house. Pharrell and Helen’s three new babies join their 8-year-old son Rocket.

That picture of Pharrell and Helen strolling out of Barneys was taken at the end of December, which means that’s what Helen looked like just a couple weeks before giving birth to triplets. I’ve never had one baby, let alone three, but I feel like I would look like hot death farted in that final month. Helen looks totally normal. Present-day Helen, on the other hand, is probably looking back on that time like “LOL remember when I used to go places and didn’t have three kids attached to me?” Actually, now that I think about it, this might be the first year Pharrell actually ages in the face. Non-stop exposure to three tiny screaming, wet-pooping infants will do that to a person.

Pic: Splash

Hot Slut Of The Day!

January 31, 2017 / Posted by:

Sinon Loresca, model, actor, comedian “social media entertainer” and an expert strutter who’s got a PhD from Sissy That Walk U.

Thank you to NewNowNext for directing my attention to the retina-singeing strut game of Sinon Loresca who burned up the ground while working the soles off a pair of glittery cha cha heels. Sinon regularly takes his thousands of Instagram followers higher with his Olympic gold medal-worthy posing and strutting skills, but his latest video really sent tricks to the farthest star in the universe.

Maxine Medina is currently Miss Universe Philippines and even though she didn’t become Miss Universe on Sunday (Miss France took the crown), she was the true winner of the week. I mean, was Miss France’s walk recreated by a glitter rod of muscles in a Speedo? I think not. Sinon recreated Miss Philippines’ signature catwalk in a video that has gotten over 10 million views in a few days. Get into, the Pavel Petel of the Philippines struttin’, swaying, twirling and swinging those hips like you leaving the office on a Friday that’s also a payday. Fun fact: That yellow tape was put up by authorities as a precaution. They knew that Sinon’s strut may knock the people over.

And four seconds after the first part of that video was shot, someone from the building behind him ran out and gave Sinon Loresca the deed to that walkway, because trick just owned it and then some.

Pic: Instagram

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Birthday Sluts

January 31, 2017 / Posted by:

Carol Channing (96)
Joel Courtney (21)
Tyler Hubbard (30)
Marcus Mumford (30)
Justin Timberlake (36)
Tiffany Limos (37)
Bobby Moynihan (40)
Kerry Washington (40)
Kate Shindle (40)
Paul Scheer (41)
Jackie O (42)
Anna Silk (43)
Portia de Rossi (44)
Patricia Velasquez (46)
Minnie Driver (47)
Kelly Lynch (58)
Anthony LaPaglia (58)
Johnny Rotten (61)
Nolan Ryan (70)
Jessica Walter (76)
Queen Beatrix of the Netherlands (79)
Philip Glass (80)
Jean Simmons (1929-2010)
Jackie Robinson (1919-1972)
Tallulah Bankhead (1902-1968)

Pic: Splash

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