That’s right, Officer Gary from Friends seems to love Chris Brown. Michael Rapaport was motivated to leap to Chris Brown’s defense during a recent episode of his podcast I Am Rapaport. Go ahead and cue up Randy Newman’s You’ve Got A Friend in Me for this one.
This all has to do with Aziz Ansari’s monologue from his appearance on last weekend’s episode of Saturday Night Live. Aziz joked that Trump was “the Chris Brown of politics.” Chris didn’t like that, and he slapped back at Aziz telling “Aladdin” to hop off his dick. According to The Wrap, Michael Rapaport had many feelings about Aziz Ansari’s joke and he let them out on episode #252 of his podcast, which was released yesterday. And just like Chris Brown did before him, Michael takes a misguided racial turn.
“Aziz Ansari, who the fuck do you think you are? Why are you dragging him [Chris Brown] through the mud? Who are you to talk about him? Obviously, nobody supports beating women. OK. This guy has obviously suffered, you see all the trouble he has and all the trouble that surrounds him. He’s definitely dealing with some shit and dealing with his own personal demons.
But Aziz Ansari, you are one of these holier-than-thou political correct police. This little fuck. Mr. Racial, he’s like Mr. Provocative…he’s like, ‘Oh, the brown people this.’ He’s always talking about the brown people and I get that he tries to be racially provocative. He is racially provocative…I’m not saying he’s not funny. I’m not saying he’s not talented. And I’m not saying his voice isn’t warranted, but you are not holier than thou.
I said this once and I’ll say it again. If you watch his show ‘Masters of None,’… Aziz Ansari, Mr. Fucking Racially Provocative, Mister Fucking Button Pusher, politically correct judger, has never seen a white girl he hasn’t liked. This guy, every single girl on his show that he’s with, white girls. You ain’t never saw a white girl you didn’t like, did you Mr. brown guy.”
Michael Rapaport is 46, which is entirely too old to be on Team Breezy. But I can see why he’s drawn to Chris Brown. They’re both messes! And being a mess technically has no age limit. Not to mention that Michael Rapaport can relate to Chris Brown on a deep spiritual level. Sorry, did I say deep spiritual level? I meant to say he can relate to Chris Brown on whatever level you’d find acting like a violent asshole to your famous girlfriend.
I will say this though; Michael Rapaport really knows how to pump up Chris Brown’s self-esteem. Chris should hire him to act like his own personal Mickey Goldmill during that boxing match with Soulja Boy. Just get him a little beanie and a towel for his shoulder. I’m sure Michael Rapaport would be into it.