Patrick Stewart has the kind of very serious British voice that was made for narrating a documentary about tuberculosis or recording an outgoing voicemail message for The Queen. But apparently some people hear Patrick Stewart’s voice and think it would sound perfect coming out of the mouth of an animated smiling turd, which brings us to where we are now.
The Hollywood Reporter says that Patrick Stewart has joined the cast of The Emoji Movie, the movie about emojis. Sir Patrick will voice the poop emoji. His character’s name is simply Poop. The casting was announced earlier today during a presentation by Sony Pictures Animation. They also announced several other casting additions that make a little more sense than Sir Patrick Stewart. Joining T.J. Miller as an emoji named Gene and a code breaker played by Ilana Glazer will be Maya Rudolph, Jake T. Austin, James Corden, and Jennifer Coolidge.
For those of you who reading this news and picturing a movie about scat-curious emojis, Tony Leondis (the director of The Emoji Movie) explained what the plot of the movie is.
“I know what you’re thinking – WTF. What is their story? Emoji are expected to be one thing their whole lives. So I thought, what if one was born with not one, but lots of expressions…and how would that affect the status quo? Everyone has felt different – it’s everyone’s story.”
Having the poop voiced by Patrick Stewart kind of works for me; who wouldn’t want their BMs to sound all respectable and dignified. But since they’re going lowbrow with a poop emoji character, I really hope they also wrote in an eggplant emoji. And I also hope it’s voiced by The Game, because who else?