“Agonizing custody battles” has become an unfortunate trend with our celebrity friends lately. Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have reportedly been scrapping over their hundreds of children (how do they even keep track of them, there’s so many). Yesterday, we watched a dismal video of law enforcement at Paula Patton’s house on behalf of Robin Thicke (he was trying to leave with their son, but no dice). Today’s the day we learn that Uma Thurman and her ex-boyfriend, French financier Arpad (Arki) Busson, have been yanking on either arm of their 4-year-old daughter Luna like she is a child-sized wishbone.
Arki publicly accused Uma of mixing booze and pills to battle mental illness during their custody trial on Friday. One, how Valley of the Dolls. Two, who doesn’t?
Page Six reports that, in court in NYC, Arki’s lawyer was questioning a psychologist, and noted a shrink had mentioned in a report that Uma likes to follow up her happy pills with a booze chaser. Welbutrin with pinot noir, right? I COULD TOTALLY BE A CELEBRITY.
“You had Mr. Busson telling you– and you put this in your report a number of times — that the mother had serious mental illness and this was a point of conflict because the mother resented being accused of having a serious mental illness,” Busson’s lawyer, Peter Bronstein, asked a psychologist.
“Yes,” said the doctor, Sara Weiss.
Dr. Sara Weiss is a court-appointed psychologist. Questioning followed about what Uma takes for meds, as well as an accusation that she’s allegedly supplementing them with self-prescribed cocktails.
Bronstein asked Weiss about the three drugs Thurman is allegedly taking — Triazolam, Wellbutrin and Klonopin — which treat depression, anxiety and insomnia.
“And she consumes alcohol, do you understand that?” Bronstein asked.
Uma’s lawyer shrieked “objection” at that point, and Arki’s lawyer backed off that line of questioning. “Arki” is sort of an adorable nickname and makes this dude sound like the wise-cracking robot sidekick on a basic cable sci-fi show. My favorite part of this report is that Uma “quietly sipped a cup of coffee and then crossed her arms” while a lawyer insinuated that she’s unstable when it comes to the usage of her meds. Can you drink coffee in court? That’s allowed now? Just have a Starbucks Trenta up on the table? Is that a celebrity perk? The last time I was in court (none of your business), the people at the tables up front weren’t treating the venue and situation like it was a Dunkin’ Donuts.
Asked about any possible side effects of the meds and why Uma might be taking them, Dr. Weiss responded that she was not an expert in medication. She also testified that she didn’t know why Beatrix Kiddo was supposedly popping pills but noted that “stress is not easy for her..”
To respond to Arki’s accusations, Uma’s lawyer tried to stop the bleeding by getting the doctor to admit that it’s not like she’s frothing at the mouth and in need of restraints.
Under cross examination by Thurman’s lawyer Weiss said she was aware that Thurman had “some Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder” and a “mild learning disability,” but no “personality disorder.”
Uma’s legal rep also accused Arki of being a shitty father.
Alter tried to paint Busson as a bad dad as Weiss testified he once let Luna ride her scooter with a helmet, climb a rock in Central Park without supervision and told her to “shut up.”
I’m not taking sides here but all that sounds like it would register relatively low on the “demonic parenting” scale. Oh, hold up, he was also accused of blowing off his daughter visiting him in the Bahamas to fly to Cuba for a Rolling Stones concert. Insanely rich people have ridiculous, albeit interesting, scheduling problems.
Uma and Arki, who dated on-and-off since 2007, put a Hattori Hanzō samurai sword (yes, I am that geeky) through their relationship for good in 2014. They were engaged twice but (thankfully it would appear) never made it down the aisle. Can you blame her? Uma’s buddy and Kill Bill director Quentin Tarantino probably would have insisted on officiating. As well as insisting that the bride is barefoot with a hemline short enough that he could have full sight line of her feet. Because you know he’s a kinkster when it comes to women’s hooves.
Please let it also be known that Uma and Arki somehow avoided their own post in the “Celebrities Tend To Give Their Children Ridiculous-Ass Names” category here on Dlisted. Because Wikipedia claims Luna’s full name is “Rosalind Arusha Arkadina Altalune Florence Thurman-Busson.” Good luck fitting that on a “Hello, I’m…” nametag at your first “Children of Celebrities” group therapy meeting, Luna!