E! claims that Drake is seriously obsessed with his alleged new girlfriend – tv cop and inspiration for the most popular Mariah meme, Jennifer Lopez. Wheelchair Jimmy is allegedly “completely falling” for her ass. (That would be the giant ass that predated that sorry, not-as-natural, giant ass the Kim Kardashian chick sports.)
E!’s source (also known as one of JLo’s publicists taking a hurried five minutes to dial up E! in between painting her mistress’ trailer on the Shades of Blue set the exact white color of a dove’s wing unless they want a sudden firing) is breathless with the news.
A source tells E! News exclusively that Drake is “completely falling for J.Lo. He has always had a crush on her growing up, so the fact that this is all coming to life is pretty cool for him. He really likes her though.”
Why does this source sound like Drake’s younger sister? This PR servant sounds like a teen queen who’s using her matter-of-fact gossipin’ voice during 5th period algebra to spill the tea on what Drippy is up to because she’s “in the know.” This high-school themed “prom” really permeated itself into the (temporary) joint JLo and Drake camps, huh? As for their age difference (she’s 47, he’s 30), it makes not a whit of difference to the sweater rapper.
The insider adds, “They laugh and get along perfectly. The age gap is not an issue for him, because he digs an older woman. J.Lo has always been into younger men, so it’s a good combo.”
Seriously, this PR flack is working overtime trying to sell this relationship. You can almost hear them sweating over trying so hard not to slip a pregnancy reference in there to increase those clicks. It’s just not time for that in the “Celebrity Fake Relationship PR Protocols.” That’s next week… or tomorrow.
As for the seriousness of their relationship, the source shares that the pair are “taking things as slow as they could, but a relationship may be in the works between them,” and explains, “He treats her like a queen and loves her work ethic and family values. This is the first girl besides Rihanna in a while that he is really into. Drake is looking for a relationship and something solid.”
As for Officer “What Do You Mean She Doesn’t Know Me?“, she’s “just having fun.” She must be. Attention is being paid, that horrible cop show Shades of Blue that she’s on got a renewed for a second season, and her arch-nemesis made a glorious and Spanx-encased fool of herself in front of Times Square (and the world) on New Years Eve.
Those irritating t-shirts and back tire covers on Jeeps are right- life IS good.