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January 4, 2017 / Posted by:

Fingos!

I’ve asked two people if they remember Fingos and both of them looked at me like they were Ryan Lochte after someone asked him to spell his first name without looking at the metal ID bracelet his mom makes him wear. Fingos may sound like what you call the orgasm you let out when someone finger bangs you, but for about four seconds in the 90s, it was the name of a revolutionary cereal from General Mills.

Fingos was a cereal that you ate with your… wait for it… fingers! It was an engineering marvel and truly revolutionary, because in the history of cereal there was never one that you could eat with your fingers. Impossible! Try eating Cheerios with your hands. As soon as you touch them, your brain will send an urgent message to your fingers that says, “THE FUCK?” Your fingers will freak out and before you have a complete nervous breakdown, you’ll grab a spoon and eat cereal the way God intended!

Because every cereal is a cereal that you can eat with your fingers, Fingos was a flopos. General Mills discontinued it just a year after putting it on shelves. It’s a damn shame that Fingos never took off and was sold internationally, specifically in Hungary. If Fingos were sold in Hungary, the people could eat farts with their fingers!  via Mr. Breakfast

“It just so happens that FING is the Hungarian word for passing gas. And that FINGOS (pronounced “fingosh”) translates in Hungarian to “He farts a lot”.

Oh, Fingos, you were way ahead of your time and because of the powerful spoon industry, you’ll probably never ever have your time. You were way too good for this world anyway.

Pic: Gone But Not Forgotten

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