TMZ says that Johnny Depp recently filed legal documents side-eyeing Amber Heard’s request for her settlement money. Amber filed a request for order in December which accused Johnny of stalling on the $6.8 million in settlement payments he owed her from their divorce. Money that she had promised to two charities, the ACLU and the Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles. Johnny shot back and asked a judge to force Amber to pony up $100,000 for his legal fees. Now Johnny is accusing Amber of wanting more settlement money. Not because she wants money, mind you. No, in Johnny Depp’s mind, she wants more money in an attempt to stay relevant and keep people feeling bad for her.
Amber allegedly filed documents asking for more settlement money. Johnny’s lawyer, Laura Wasser, called that “a blatant attempt to extend her fifteen minutes of fame” and “an embarrassing grab for additional and unwarranted attorney’s fees.” Okay, but wasn’t Johnny Depp literally just trying to grab additional attorney’s fees from Amber’s pocket? This sounds kind of like a case of the decaying corn cob calling the kernel mushy. Of course I’m no lawyer, so I can’t be sure if that’s exactly what’s happening here.
Not only does Amber want more settlement money, TMZ says she is also asking to reopen the settlement case. That’s really a terrible idea. The judge dealing with their divorce was probably officially done with their drama months ago. Reopening the settlement is only going to backfire. Amber is going to start yelling at Johnny about how she’s not a gold digger, which will cause Johnny to get all angry and sweaty and his dirty scarves will get all humid and stinky, and the judge will start dry heaving and be like “Nope, not doing this again. Give her whatever moist bills are in your wallet and a couple of rings and get out!”