Normally I’d say that Britney Spears should RUUUUUUUN from any dude named Sam. But if a Sam looks like that, then my advice to Brit Brit would be to melt that rule down into syrupy lube, spread it all over your bits and get that muscle dick.
A year and a half after Daddy Spears made the decision to not offer Susan Saint James’ son a long-term job as his daughter’s boyfriend, TMZ says that he has gotten her a major, major upgrade. Brit Brit has gone the JLo and Mimi route by humping on model/personal trainer/Instagram THOT/video ho Sam Asghari. Sam was the dude candy in Brit’s video for Slumber Party.
Brit and Sam went on a sushi date last month, and on Saturday night, they ate things together at Gyu-Kaku Japanese BBQ in Canoga Park, CA. The paps just so happened to be there and in the first picture, Brit Brit is either playing an advanced game of hide and seek with the chick in the vest, or she accidentally front pooted a wet spot onto her skirt and Sam is being a gentleman by covering it up for her. We can never accuse Sam of not doing what he’s gotta do for PR and a payroll check.
More pics of Britney and Sam. They are holding hands 😭😍😭😍😭 pic.twitter.com/QCxuSje7FO
— Britney Galaxy (@britneysgalaxy) December 19, 2016
I think I speak for all of us when I say that we cannot give our stamp of approval on Sam (because you know, our opinions really matter) until we know that he fits everything she’s looking for in a man. Brit Brit once said that she’s looking for a hot nerd with a really big dick. We need picture proof that Sam is indeed a hot nerd with a really big dick and what I mean by that is we need pictures of him naked-watching Rogue One and we need to clearly see that he’s really enjoying it, if I ain’t being too subtle.