IMPORTANT BREAKING NEWS: Prince Hot Ginge And Meghan Markle Went Christmas Tree Shopping

December 13, 2016 / Posted by:

Believe it or not, but when Prince Hot Ginge wants a Christmas tree, he doesn’t command his henchmen to gallop deep into the forest, find the most majestic fir tree and evict all of the woodland creatures from it (by order of the ginger prince!) before cutting it down and bringing it back to the palace. PHG shops for a Christmas tree like a regular, because he’s real like that.

Right after PHG wrapped up his Speedo-less tour through the Caribbean, he flew to Toronto to bump his royal ginger nips against his girlfriend, Future Princess Meghan Markle. PHG spent a quick minute with Meghan before going back to London. This past weekend, it was Meghan’s turn to do the flying and UsWeekly says that she’s been in her man’s homeland since Sunday. Any normal person who’s doing PHG full-time wouldn’t be able to leave the house. I mean, that would be impossible to do since your fuck parts would be permanently attached to his, but PHG and Meghan managed to go out in public yesterday.

People says that Meghan and PHG went Christmas tree shopping at a store called Pines and Needles lasts night. They bought a 6-foot-tall tree for $70 and PHG did hard labor by carrying it out himself. Zaqia Crawford, who sold them the tree, sprayed a river of ass juice from a bull into my eyes by saying that she had no idea who PHG was!

“They were really cool. It was a really casual situation. I had no idea who they were, so it was just like an ordinary customer conversation.

It was totally clear that they were a couple. It wasn’t overly affectionate or anything like that — they were just doing cute, couple-y stuff, like making each other laugh and being excited. Just lots of touching and laughing. They were just like any other couple.”

Zaqia is lying. Scientists and doctors have already proven that it’s physically impossible to not know when you’re in close proximity to PHG because your body tells you. If the cups of drool dripping out of your mouth doesn’t give it away, your eyelashes catching on fire will. But seriously, I’m sure Zaqia figured out that thee Prince Harry was in the store when one of his minions walked in and snatched that $70 out of her hand before handing her an invoice from the royal family for all of the publicity that store is going to get.

And here’s some thrilling pictures of Meghan shopping with a friend in the snow in Toronto on Sunday, before flying into the freckled arms royale of PHG.

Pics: Wenn.com, Splash

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