It’s been a quick minute since I posted about the legal fight for Nick Loeb and Sofia Vergara’s frozen embryos, so let’s catch up real quick. When Nick and Sofia were together, they embryos and those embryos were frozen. But then they broke up, and Sofia went on to screw her now-husband Joe ManJello and Nick went on try to screw her in court. Nick sued for custody of the frozen embryos and he mouth shit out a diarrhea stream of bullshit about how he’s pro-life and just can’t leave his “children” in a freezer. Nick cried that he’s always wanted to be a father. Sofia doesn’t want that and wants the embryos to remain frozen forever.
Since then, Sofia’s legal team put on their rubber gloves and decided to get as messy as Nick has. Sofia demanded that Nick publicly give up the names of the two ex-girlfriends who had abortions around 20 years ago. Sofia’s lawyers wanted to depose the women and question them about Nick’s past sex life and abortion beliefs. A judge in California sided with Sofia. Nick refused to spit up those names and Page Six says that instead of naming his exes, he dropped his lawsuit against Sofia in California on Tuesday. But it’s far from over and in fact, this shit has climbed to a level of fuckery I didn’t think existed. Sofia and Nick’s embryos are suing her. I see that 2016 still has a napkin tied around its neck, because it’s obviously not done with eating us alive.
The new lawsuit, which was filed in Louisiana, actually gives the embryos names. I know, just tip me over and pour me the fuck out. The lawsuit doesn’t keep it real by naming the embryos Money and Grab. Instead, the embryos have been given the second and sixth most popular girl names of 2016. Their names are Emma and Isabelle. The frozen embryos (dibs on that band name, by the way) have a trustee and dude’s name is James Carbonnet. James is also named as a plaintiff.
Page Six reports that the lawsuit states that by not being born, “Emma and Isabelle” have been cheated out of a trust that was set up for them in Louisiana. In order to get their inheritance from the trust, they need to be given to Nick Loeb so he can use a surrogate to turn them into humans. I really thought I heard it all until I heard about the tale of the gold digger who is using his embryos to gold dig.
It asks that the frozen embryos be given to Loeb so that they can live and receive the trust set up for them, which would fund, among other things, their health care and education, sources said.
As those of us who have been following this mess of a case knows, Sofia and Nick signed a contract that states that neither of them can use the embryos without the consent of the other. Emma and Isabelle’s lawsuit argues that the contract should be voided because it doesn’t say what should happen if the couple breaks up.
The lawsuit also contends that a contract Vergara and Loeb previously signed at the ART Reproductive Center in Beverly Hills should be voided since it violated California code and Louisiana law, according to sources.
Page Six believes that Nick had the lawsuit filed in Louisiana, because the state tends to be more on the pro-life side and he also went to Tulane University.
Nick Loeb has probably spent a pile of cash on legal fees and he easily could’ve used that money to make his own children by now. But then I guess he would’ve missed out on the sweet satisfaction of messing with Sofia Vergara. And it looks like 2016 is going to be as messy as 2017. I won’t be surprised if this goes to trial and Nick Loeb’s lawyer says, “We’d like to call the plaintiffs to the stand,” before a freezer with Emma and Isabelle in it is rolled into the courtroom.