There are many things from the 80s that I think should rebooted and brought back like Jell-O 1-2-3, Stacey Q’s career and The Charmings. But there are even more things from the 80s that I think should not be rebooted and should be left alone, and Little Shop of Horrors is at the top of that list. But since Hollywood is pretty much just a giant Audrey II who gets more powerful by eating and killing what you love most, they’re planning to remake Little Shop of Horrors.
A remake of Little Shop starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Seymour was announced in 2012, but that idea collected dust on the back shelf. Deadline says that Warner Bros. has pulled that idea off the shelf, blew the dust off and handed it over to Greg Berlanti (Dawson’s Creek, Arrow, The Flash, Supergirl and that Riverdale mess) to direct. Greg, producer Marc Blatt and screenwriter Matthew Robinson are working on a “fresh version” of the 1986 movie that was based on the Broadway musical and was directed by Frank Oz and starred Rick Moranis and Ellen Greene. The musical was, of course, based on the 1960 movie that was directed by Roger Corman.
Jake Gyllenhaal and Ellen Greene starred in a concert version of Little Shop last year.
I don’t know if “fresh version” means that they’re modernizing it, but if they are, then Seymour and Audrey are going to be two hipsters who work in the flower department at Whole Foods and instead of dating a diabolical dentist, Audrey will date a diabolical pharmaceutical executive. At one point, Audrey II will stop eating people because society’s obsession with body image will cause him to want to get skinny by going vegan. So yeah, Audrey II will basically become a cannibal in the reboot.
And this new Little Shop is obviously going to be CGI’d to hell and back, but then again, they may decide to really bring it into the now by casting Kim Kardashian’s noted man-eating ass as Audrey II.
Pic: Warner Bros.