Back in July, Michael K had the unenviable task of breaking some hard news to us: Lifetime kicking us in our nostalgia nads by remaking Beaches. Well, we’re fast approaching the release of Beaches 2.0, so Lifetime released a trailer. Let’s just watch this thing and get it over with.
As you can see, the new version is going to have Idina Menzel in Bette Midler’s spot and Nia Long in Barbara Hershey’s. As you can hear, Idina is going to be caterwauling Bette’s 1988 hit “Wind Beneath My Wings” among other songs, both old and new.
I hopped off the Idina Menzel train head-first back during those unspeakable years when every child alive wanted to sing Frozen songs at me. She’s a great talent and she gave us one of my favorite John Travolta gaffes of all time so I won’t hate too hard. But that voice sends the wrong kind of chills up my spine and this trailer was tough.
Even tougher are the visuals. This trailer looks like an extended ad for a medium-fancy rehab facility that calls itself a “wellness retreat center.” Whatever it is, it’s definitely not the original. Remember how shitty and selfish CC was? And how Hillary would just sit and scowl all aloof in a corner? THAT was drama. This new trailer is just cuts of two women laughing and touching their foreheads together.
Click below if you’ve ever seen two suburban moms catching up at a Cracker Barrel and thought, “I wish this story would come to life.”