Hot Slut Of The Day!

November 28, 2016 / Posted by:

Pigcasso!

Anybody who knows a milliounce about art will one hundred percent tell you that the greatest artist of this and every other generation is Pricasso, the regular Bob Ross who uses nature’s paintbrush (aka his dick) to create exquisite works of art. And now Pricasso finally has a successor: the painting pig known as Pigcasso! Pigcasso doesn’t paint with her peen, because she doesn’t have one! Instead, Pigcasso uses her mouth to create the kind of HIGH ART that is making the real Picasso fart out clouds of jealousy in the afterworld.

Caters News (via The New York Post) says that Pigcasso was about to become bacon and pork chops in a South African slaughterhouse before she was saved by animal-rights activist Joanne Lefson. Joanne wanted Pigcasso to pick up a hobby to keep her ass entertained. Joanne threw a football at her pet pig, but Pigcasso cares about football as much as I do. But when Joanne gave her a paintbrush, a true artiste was born!

Pigcasso’s style is more like Pollock (Porkllock?) meets Jasper Johns to me, but Joanne sees Picasso for some reason (and that reason may have to do with Picasso’s name being easier to turn into a pork pun). Joanne also says that she’s not some crazy stage mom of the art world who has threatened to send Babe’s master artist relative back to the bacon-making house if that pig doesn’t paint, paint, paint! Joanne says that the urge to do art shit naturally flows through Pigcasso’s pork veins:

“I do not force her to paint. She paints when she wants to. Often, we pack an overloaded picnic basket and she pigs out on organic strawberries, guavas and caramel-coated popcorn in between brush strokes. For Pigcasso, it’s simply hog heaven.’’

And here’s riveting video of Pigcasso at work:

Joanne plans to start selling Pigcasso’s work next year and will donate money from the sales to a charity that raises awareness for the plight of farm animals. And if movies about artists taught me anything, it’s that they’re all tortured on the inside. So in about a month, I expect Cater News to report that a drunken Pigcasso ruined Christmas dinner as a frustrated Marcia Gay Harden shook her head at that pig.

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