Hot Slut Of The Day!

November 13, 2016 / Posted by:

The Ding Dong foil wrapper of the olden days!

Do you remember where you were when you opened up a box of Ding Dongs and discovered that the shiny, glorious and fancy aluminum foil wrapper had been blasphemously replaced with a basic bitch plastic wrapper?! Since the memory chip in my brain is corroded and crusted over, I don’t remember. But I’m sure I screamed, “YOU ARE NOT MY DING DONG!”, when I held that boring white plastic-covered Ding Dong and learned that it no longer looked like a gleaming hockey puck. The foil-wrapped Ding Dong was a beacon of pure deliciousness that lit up a flame of excitement in a person and let them know that they were about to feast on some diabetes-inducing processed goodness. Hostess killed dreams when it retired it.

When I was a little kid, the gifts I gave my mom for Christmas (aka the stuff I stole from her bedroom to give back to her since I didn’t have a job) were wrapped in foil, because that shit was fancy to me. So the foil-wrapped Ding Dong looked like a gorgeous gift in my young eyes.

There are petitions on the internet that beg for Hostess to do what’s right and bring back the foil-wearing Ding Dong (side note: “foil-wearing Ding Dong” sounds like a cutesy name for a conspiracy theorizing peen), because like most things, Ding Dongs are just better when they’re wrapped in foil.

hsotddingdongfoil

Never forget foil-wrapped Ding Dongs, they were the Becky #1 of their time.

Pic: Banal Leakage, Pinterest

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