On Erection Eve – That was a typo and I’m going to keep it, even though it makes no sense since this caca storm of an election has been the complete opposite of sexy and nobody’s got a boner. Well, Ken Bone may have a boner since that trick is always horny.
But anyway, on Election Eve, the mutated Oompa Loompa gooch wart was at a rally in Manchester, New Hampshire where he said that Tom Brady voted for him. It wouldn’t be that surprising if Tom voted for Trump, because they are bro-friends (see: them in the picture above looking like conjoined twins from HELL) and he did have a “Make America Great Again” hat in his locker room. But in Tom’s defense, he may not have not know what that hat meant since he can’t read. Tom also said last year that he thinks Trump has what it takes to be president.
People says that at his rally, Trump told everyone that he’s got Tom Brady’s support.
“Tom Brady, great guy, great guy. Great guy, great friend of mine — great, great champion. Unbelievable winner,” Trump said of the New England Patriots quarterback. “He called today and he said, ‘Donald, I support you, you’re my friend, and I voted for you.’ ”
BUT WAIT! Tom Brady said last night that he didn’t vote early. And when one of Gisele Bundchen’s Instagram followers asked her if she and Tom are on Team Moldy Naranja, she answered back with a simple: NO!
Just throwing this out there. (Top comments.) pic.twitter.com/a3svMKTLGx
— Doug Kyed (@DougKyed) November 8, 2016
Donald Trump never makes anything up, so I’m sure he’s telling the 100% truth. So either someone crank called him (see: Tim Kaine doing a voice impersonation of Tom Brady as Hillary Clinton cackles in the background) or Tom Brady really did call him. If it’s the latter, then OOOOooooOOOOOO, he’s gonna get it. Gisele probably told Tommy not to hang around that Trump brat. It’s bad for business. She’s totally going to put Tom on 2 weeks of water slide restriction and she’s going to get their chef to serve him nothing but strawberries for breakfast, lunch and dinner! You’re in trooooouble, Tommy!