“Doctor Strange” Is Jaden Smith’s New Religion

November 7, 2016 / Posted by:

Millions of people have seen Doctor Strange (proof: the $85 million it made at the domestic box office this past weekend), but I bet that none of them were more enlightened by it than intergalactic sage Jaden Smith. Jaden Smith’s mind is already wide open so it takes something beyond powerful to open it up even more and that movie about a surgeon wizard did just that. If Marvel passed out donation baskets after every showing of Doctor Strange, Jaden would’ve dropped in the AMEX black card his parents gave him, because that movie was like a life-changing sermon to him. You won’t find me (totally) laughing at 18-year-old Jaden Smith, because when I was around his age, I saw Showgirls for the first time and immediately declared that holy work of art my new spiritual advisor, and it still is!

The shift key-loving Twitter philosopher saw Doctor Strange last week and in his review of it, announced that it’s not a movie to him, it’s his bible. While Jaden’s tweet isn’t pushing me to want to see Doctor Strange, it did make me wish that I was the child of millionaire movie stars, because you get to go to private movie screenings where you won’t be thrown out for toking up like crazy. Jaden’s tweet also confirms to me that Doctor Strange is elaborate Scientology propaganda.

So, I guess this means that Jaden will soon leave Calabasas and run off to a monastery in the Himalayas to learn magic shit. But don’t pour one out for the loss of Jaden’s Twitter account just yet, I’m sure he’ll back after he goes to a monastery and finds actual monks instead of Tilda Swinton in a bald cap.

And here’s the lone member (for now) of the new religion, DoctorStrangeology, at the MTV EMAs in Rotterdam, Netherlands last night. Judging by his one facial expression, it’s obvious that he’s still stunned by the spiritual power of Doctor Strange!

Pics: Wenn.com

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