Hot Slut Of The Day!
THE TARP OF NEVER-ENDING DOOM from last night’s 599 hour-long final game of the World Series.
I did not watch every minute of Game 7 of the World Series between that team in the blue shirts and that team in the black shirts, because watching a sport where the dudes wear baggy pants and not tight Spandex bulge-hugging tight leggings is just cruel torture to me. So instead, I watched the World Series of lonely old gays (5 episodes of HGTV’s Island Hunters, which I DVR. You know you’re sad when you DVR Island Hunters.) But I switched over to the World Series, because everyone on Twitter kept crying about a tarp and I needed to see that life-ruining motherfucker asshole tarp for myself! It looked like a tarp.
A river of panty cream and jizz is flowing out of Chicago today because their team won for the first time since this current election started (and according to my nerves, this election has been going on for 108 years). But before they won, they played the Cleveland Indians for 10 long innings. And before the 10th inning started, the game was put on pause and a tarp was brought out. I figured that the tarp was brought out, because they needed something to wrap the dead bodies of all of the fans in the stands who died of anticipation. But God decided to screw with everyone and made it rain, so a delay was called and the tarp was rolled out. The rain delay only lasted a little over 15 minutes, but it felt like it lasted 15 lifetimes and people on Twitter had feelings about it.
You gotta be kidding me. pic.twitter.com/8kBIDqzIlO
— NFL Memes (@NFL_Memes) November 3, 2016
That tarp was my MVP of the night. Not only did it piss off a lot of baseball fans by cock-blocking the game, but I’m sure it really pissed off a lot of greedy Fox executives too. After that bright, white blank canvas was rolled out, they saw a giant missed opportunity to fill their pockets with even more $$$$$$. That tarp was the ONE thing at the World Series that wasn’t sponsored by some corporation. Oh, tarp, I love you, keep pissing off fans and greedy network executives.
Pic: SB Nation