Porn Actress Jessica Drake Claims Donald Trump Offered Her $10,000 To Have Sex With Him

The NY Daily News reports that adult film star Jessica Drake has become the 12th woman to come forward in recent weeks to accuse pig in a wig presidential candidate Donald Trump of alleged skeevy behavior. In related news, Donald revealed that he plans to sue all of his accusers after the election. Tiny-Hands’ situation hasn’t reached DEFCON level Bill Cosby territory just yet, but it’s getting there.

Jessica claims that anthropomorphic bile duct Donald chatted her up at a celebrity golf tournament in Lake Tahoe in 2006. Jessica, who was repping porn studio Wicked at the time, says that he asked for her phone number and then invited her up to his penthouse suite. She went, but took along two of her friends. Donald’s alleged greeting demonstrated that he wasn’t kidding when he described his playbook for encounters with the opposite sex to Billy Bush on the Access Hollywood “bus of no” the year before.

“He grabbed each of us tightly in a hug and kissed each of us on the lips without asking for permission,” she recalled.

Jessica says that her group made for the exit when the married Donald asked about her relationship status and her porn experiences. That’s when he began utilizing her digits.

One of Trump’s underlings called later to invite her back, and then Trump himself called.

“What do you want?” he asked her, according to Drake. “How much?”

Pure poetry. I’m certain that his honeyed words could charm the birds down from the trees! This sweet-nothing was followed by an exact sum and an offer to help her with her commute.

“I received another call from Donald, or a male calling on his behalf offering me $10,000,” she said. “I declined once again, and once more gave as an excuse that I had to return to Los Angeles for work.

“I was then told Mr. Trump would allow me the use of his private jet to take me home if I accepted his invitation.”

$10,000 to get with that man is like offering someone a quarter to swan dive into raw sewage. Cheapskate. On Donald’s part, he denied the accusations against him during his rally in Gettysburg, PA yesterday. CNN reports that he also plans to punish everyone legally. It didn’t quite have the majesty of “Four score and seven years ago…”

“Every woman lied when they came forward to hurt my campaign,” Trump said during remarks in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania. “Total fabrication. The events never happened. Never. All of these liars will be sued after the election is over.”

Donald also accused his opponent, “nasty woman” Hillary Clinton, of masterminding these ladies to come forward and lie that he did some gross shit to them that he’s previously gone on record saying that he likes to do.

“It was probably the Democratic National Committee and Hillary’s campaign who put forward these liars with their fabricated stories,” he said. “But we’ll probably find out later through litigation, which we’re so looking forward to.”

I’m currently nursing a hangover and typing on my couch in boxers while coated in a fine dusting of ginger snap crumbs, because I ate a whole bag of them before I passed out last night. I still have more dignity and poise at this moment than this election has had or will ever have.

Pic: NY Daily News