As The Conspiracy Theorists Of The Cumberbitches Adjust Their Tin Foil Hats….
The Hollywood premiere of Marvel’s Doctor Whitewashing Doctor Strange happened last night, and Benedict Cumberbatch brought two guests: his wife Sophie Hunter and the latest CumberBaby that’s gestating in her womb right now.
Congratulations to us all for getting to end the week with the image of The Alien Lizard King busting a raw alien lizard nut up into Sophie Hunter while open-mouth humping her. And because you really want to know, this is what I picture B.Cums’ excited “busting a cum batch” face looking like:
Sophie birthed out their first child, a boy named Christopher “Kit” Carlton Cumberbatch, in June 2015. B. Cums’ rep confirms to People that Sophie is pregnant with their second child and that “everyone is absolutely thrilled.”
I know that B. Cums’ rep meant “B. Cums and his family” when he said everyone, but if you ask the conspiracy theorists branch of the Cumberbitches (the ones B. Cums called out recently), then many, many people are happy about this. Sophie Hunter is happy because her wife contract has been extended longer. B. Cums’ PR team is happy because he’s getting more attention before Doctor Strange comes out. The makers of Tempur-Pedic’s line of baby bumps and custom-made Baby Grows dolls are happy because they’re getting return business from Sophie. And even the conspiracy theorizing Cumberbitches are secretly happy, because now they have a new stunt to expose. It’s happy news for everyone!
