Bernice Starnes Is September’s Hot Slut Of The Month!

October 10, 2016 / Posted by:

Like any of the other Hot Slut of the Days stood one chance. Jacques Jolie-Pitt, the Sharp Boombox and Robby LaRiviere from Logo’s Finding Prince Charming were absolutely no match against the power of Bernice Starnes!

Bernice Starnes is the 85-year-old President of the Bronx’s chapter of the Not The One Society, and she stole all of our dead hearts last month when she spit out some fighting words for the bitch who stole her purse as she sat in her wheelchair outside of her apartment building. Bernice said back then that she’d love to beat that bitch who stole her purse (and you know her wig game would stay tight while she did it). Bernice hasn’t gotten to do that yet, but she did beat the shit out of her other HSOTD competitors and now she’s our reigning Hot Slut of the Month.

Bernice got 45% of the votes, leaving Jacques (25%), Sharp Boombox (23%) and Robby LaRiviere (7%) eating her dust. Bernice will go on to the Hot Slut of the Year finals next year. And now I leave you with these words of wisdom that Bernice wrote for The New York Post. Bernice wrote an op-ed piece on getting mugged, and said nowadays, people are on drugs, which causes them to disrespect the elderly and commit crimes. Bernice said that the thief who robbed her did it out of hunger, and Miss Bernice has no sympathy.

That’s why she grabbed my pocketbook. Well, she could have gone to a damn soup kitchen to get something to eat. Why grab a pocketbook? Being hungry is not an excuse.

They ought to go to jail for life and give them the chair while you’re at it. Let me pull the switch to fry their ass.

The victims should be able to do that. Why not? I wouldn’t take my hand off until they fry.

DAMN! So if Miss Bernice was Supreme Court Justice Bernice, half of the population would probably end up being Kentucky Fried Fucked, because she’d send everyone to the electric chair! “Justice Bernice, my client Michael K is very sorry that he got caught smoking a joint in the park. Please have mercy on his soul.” “I, Justice Bernice, am happy to fry the druggie bitch in the chair!

I don’t know if the world is ready for Miss Bernice to join SCOTUS, but if Judge Judy ever needs to call in sick, then bring Miss Bernice in and watch those tricks shiver out of their bodies!

Thanks to everyone who voted!

Pic: ABC7NY

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