Candy Spelling will soon be writing a couple extra zeros on her monthly children-of-my-broke-child support checks, because Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott are expecting their fifth child. Tori and The Deaner gave the EXCLUSIVE details of their pregnancy to People magazine, who I hope were smart and made the check out to Amex.
Tori says it was a “total surprise“, but that she’s really happy because she and the sperm deaner always wanted a big family. I’m not sure that it was much of a surprise. After all, they are too broke to get The Deaner a vasectomy, remember? 43-year-old Tori and 49-year-old Deaner have 4 kids: Liam (9), Stella (8), Hattie (5), and Finn (4). The Deaner also has an 18-year-old son with his ex-wife Mary Jo Eustace.
— People Babies (@PEOPLEbabies) October 5, 2016
There’s a couple more pictures of the McDuggars over at People.
Tori and Dean’s marriage was a Class-1 MESS a few years ago, so I’m sure Johnson & Johnson has already received dozens of calls asking for a “Congratulations on your baby!” gift basket filled with Band-Aids to be sent over to Tori and Dean’s house. But Tori says it’s not like that.
“This baby happened at the best time. Nothing is ever perfect, but I’m so madly in love with my husband and with our kids. The idea of adding to that is such a blessing.”
I don’t know if The Deaner’s friends read People. It might be a good idea for him to write up a quick little pregnancy announcement just in case.
“Extra extra, what’s crappenin? Good news hombres, The Deaner is gonna be a daddy again! There I was, chugging brewskis in the garage listening to Trooper and polishing my hog (my motorcycle was there too – UP TOP) when Tori walks in and is like, hey, get your beady-eyed ass here, I’m bored. Big D might not have a job, but Little D is always working overtime!“