Open Post: Hosted By The Simon Cowell Toe That Viewers Thought Was A Dick

October 2, 2016 / Posted by:

TV Mean Girl Simon Cowell was just sitting comfortably between fellow X Factor judges, Scary Spice and Baby Spice (fine, their slightly more real names are Mel B and Emma Bunton) while judging the poor unfortunates on UK’s The X Factor. Viewers at home grew concerned when it appeared as though Simon was a little TOO into the performances. To speak frankly, Simon looked like his dick had popped out to say something devastatingly snarky that would end a musical hopeful’s dreams. Or maybe Simon had kept a secret Spice Girls fantasy to himself all this time and he just couldn’t hold back any further.

Thankfully, it was actually his big toe that was the horny attention whore. He just had his leg folded up. At least that’s what the Daily Mail thinks. Simon hasn’t commented. I HOPE that’s what happened. Otherwise, Scary and Baby need to zigga-zig-ah his ass to jail.

Watch Simon question a contestant’s choice in cosmetics while his toe looks inappropriate below.

Pic: The X Factor

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