More pics from the set of Ocean’s Eight came out and judging by their outfits, Cate Blanchett is playing a hot washed-up lesbian rock singer turned con woman and Helena Bonham Carter is playing Helena Bonham Carter – Lainey Gossip
The fashion industry is still trying to make Hailey Baldwin happen – Drunken Stepfather
…and they really need to stop – Hollywood Tuna
Somebody please tell Prince Hot Ginge that I’ve read that a cure for baldness is saliva from a desperate skinny fat gay American blogger. I read this on WebMD! – Celebitchy
Teresa Giudice is serving up “Planet of the Apes meets I Dream of Jeannie” – Reality Tea
If you’ve have a hard day and are stressed out, soothe your nerves and meditate on Katie Price’s hypnotizing camel toe – The Nip Slip
When Kelly Preston’s son died, Donald Trump, being the tasteful and sympathetic kind soul he is, wrote about how he tried to fuck her once – The Superficial
Bump Watch (yes, I want to punch myself for writing that): The Natalie Portman Edition – Popoholic
Hillary Clinton has won the coveted try-hard performance artist douche demographic – Towleroad
NOT THIS STUPID SHIT GAIN! (It’s paint, duh) – SOW
NOT THIS STUPID SHIT AGAIN AGAIN! (It’s Bill Murray, duh) – Popsugar
I hate James Corden for not throwing Lady Gaga’s dumb pink hat out the window when he had the chance – OMG Blog
Patton Oswalt wrote a soul-melting piece about the loss of his wife – Pajiba
Michael Phelps got secret married months ago. If Ryan Lochte had a brain, it would explode while thinking about not using your engagement and wedding to get as much attention as possible – Just Jared
Great, now Donald Trump is going to scream that a wall must be built around his star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame and East Hollywood has to pay for it! – HuffPo
As Katie Holmes silently weeps about no longer watching Jamie Foxx’s meaty chichis bounce up and down as he humps her (although, they may not be over), her ex-master Tom Cruise is apparently getting serious with a chick who needs to run, run, ruuuuuuuun, while she still can!
Jaden Smith is many things: actor, child of famous people, enlightened intergalactic space philosopher. But did you know he was also once a vampire? It’s true! Well, at least according to Jaden Smith. You know, I always pictured Jaden as more of a wise alien taking the form of a rich teenage earthling, but I was clearly wrong.
The other Amber Rose, Amber Rose Tamblyn, recently announced that she’s knocked up and her husband of four years David Cross is the father. As you can see from the picture above, Amber and David aren’t regular famous people, they’re cool famous people. So I would never expect them to announce they’re having a baby by posting a cheesy black and white picture on Instagram of David caressing Amber’s bump with both their eyes closed. That’s nowhere close to how they announced the news.
Off the top of my head, there’s two answers to the question, “How in the hell do you end up folded up like a Choco Taco in a freezer bin?” Answer 1 is: You just did bareback butt sex with Russell Brand and sat in there to stop the burning. Answer 2 is: YOU DRUNK. The second one is most likely the answer to how this British flower ended up ass-first in a freezer at a store.
Reddit (via Death and Taxes) posted a clip of a woman hollering for dear life as she risked getting frostbite of the b-hole. Oh, booze, one second it tells you to get some crisps at the store, and the next second it tells you that getting into a freezer bin is a really funny idea. As her friend tried to shush her up, the drunk mess screamed about how she doesn’t want to be known as the fat girl who dies in a freezer.
Sadly, the girl died in that freezer and her tombstone reads, “She will always be known as the fat girl who dies in a freezer…”
But seriously, she acts like being known as the “fat girl who dies in a freezer” is the worst thing ever. It’s not. If your drunk ass dies in a freezer, you won’t be alive to hear people making fun of you for it. Shitting in a freezer is worse! I mean, sometimes booze gives people the runs and if you got in that position… SPLAT! Suddenly those frozen peas have some gravy to go with them. And you wouldn’t be able to walk down the street without someone pointing at you and saying, “HA! HA! You’re the drunk who shit in a freezer.“
Shortly after Kim Kardashian was robbed at gunpoint in her apartment in Paris, sources were saying that Kim was blaming herself for being herself (aka shamelessly flaunting her jewels on social media). Whatever chemicals Khloe Kardashian has been injecting into her face must have seeped into her brain and ate the part responsible for making smart decisions, because last night she flaunted her jewels on Instagram. Slow-é strikes again!