I can only give Justin Theroux’s STAINS impersonation a C since he didn’t perfect it by making Jennifer Aniston hold up a platter full of cupcakes in front of him.
As Brangelina’s marriage gets buried under a pile of dead cherubs who lost their will to live after the meaning of everlasting love died, Jennifer Aniston and her wedded piece Justin Theroux went out to dinner in NYC. Justin, who wore a look straight from Hot Topic’s Cool Dad collection, is probably bulgy -eyed like that, because his skinny jeans are suffocating his low-hanging huevos and he’s feeling the pain.
Or maybe, just maybe, Justin’s eyeballs are trying to escape out of their sockets because his head is slowly exploding as the paparazzi shower them with flashes while asking Jennifer if she’s holding on to her man so tight because that home wrecking viper hussy Trampelina HOlie is single again and is going to snatch Justin up! No, the paps would never!