Meanwhile, as the marriage of the CENTURY is ending…
After nine years of marriage, hot grumpy food person Anthony Bourdain and his MMA fighter wife Ottavia Busia are over. I guess you could say they officially have no reservations on each other’s parts. Oh lord, that was bad. I deserve every AnthonyBourdainStinkface.gif for that.
Sources have told Page Six that 60-year-old Anthony and 38-year-old Ottavia have been separated for a while, but stress that nothing shady happened. Nobody stuck their parts unknown in anyone else. Anthony and Ottavia share a 10-year-old daughter Ariane and two sets of matching tattoos.
Anthony hasn’t said anything about the death of his 9-year marriage, but Ottavia has! And yeah, it’s not that dramatic. Ottavia told Page Six in an email that they’ve both always been busy with work, which made for an”unconventional relationship.” Bourdain also travels a lot for his TV shows, and Ottavia says he was only home for holidays. She adds that they both love each other very much and will always be “a family.”
Anthonoy Bourdain is single again. I’m sure it’s taken about 0.6 seconds for people who get the vapors for Bourdain to begin writing some weird food-themed hate-fucking fanfic starring him and his arch nemesis Guy Fieri. I can picture it now. A sad, single Anthony wanders around Manhattan in the rain after meeting with a divorce lawyer. He accidentally wanders into Guy’s American Kitchen & Bar and orders some toilet food. Guy Fieri peeks out from the kitchen and decides to seize the moment and get revenge on Bourdain by farting in his Wham Bam Thank You Ham Sandwich Sushi Nachos, but feels bad once he sees how sad he is. Instead, he removes his wraparound Oakleys from his peroxide nest and whispers “Come with me to flavortown.”