This week, in one of the more bizarre (and delightful) daytime television occurrences in recent memory, Corey Feldman and his band of angels somehow gained access to the Today .He proceeded to give us the most unwittingly hilarious television performance since Meghan Trainor’s ass gave the stage a deep soul kiss over at The Tonight Show.
The general public is full of buffoons who don’t understand what art is, so the majority reaction to Corey’s performance was boos from all over the Internet. Well, I hope you’re all happy because you’ve made Corey cry. Literally. Corey and his “maingel” Courtney Anne posted a Facebook Live video in which he cries and shames the bullies who have rendered the couple housebound! The video has been taken down but People posted the words that Corey said about how the hate has kept him and Courtney Anne from leaving their Sleep Number.
“We just wanted to tell everybody that, like, it’s been really painful. We put ourselves out there and we did the best that we could. And, like, I’ve never had such mean things said about me. Like constantly. All we can say is that we tried really hard, because we love our fans and we just wanted to give them the best show that we could. But we don’t deserve … these things that are said about us are awful. It was a song, okay? It wasn’t that weird. I’m sorry if it’s not good enough for you, but you don’t have to beat us up. I just want to say that, like, why is it okay to, like, publicly shame us? … I don’t understand … It’s, like, not PC to, like, say somebody is fat or somebody is white or somebody is black or somebody is yellow or green or if they have a short leg or if they have a missing finger. Like we can’t talk about these things. But it’s okay to bash Corey Feldman and the Angels. We can’t get out of bed right now. We’re petrified to even go out … And I’m sorry, but we just wanted the world to know, like, we’re really freaked out over this and it’s really not fair. Public shaming should not be accepted, no matter who you are,” he said. “It doesn’t matter if they’re a celebrity or not. We deserve love and we deserve, like, normal life. It’s not okay, it’s not acceptable to call us freaks, weirdos, losers, whatever.”
“And, like, I don’t even know what to do or to say because I thought the performance was good and I was, like, excited about it.”
These two have a slight “Courtney Stodden and her gross husband air” about them. No one should be made to cry, but come now, Corey. You can’t go on TV dressed and moving like a Grauman’s Chinese Theater sidewalk performer doing a horrifically bad MJ and expect everyone to get it. Plus, in silver lining news, this is the most press you’ve gotten since you put Hollywood diddlers on blast.
My question is, who at the Today has the ironic sense of humor that let this boat run aground in the first place? Or have the producers started drinking alongside Hoedown and Kathie Lee and this one just slipped by?