Naya Rivera’s Fake Tits Are The Best $8,000 Purchase She’s Ever Made

August 31, 2016 / Posted by:

The only tell-all from a Rivera I want is one from Chita Rivera, but Naya Rivera wrote her memoir. To sell it, her publisher pushed out a couple of excerpts about how she got an abortion on her day off from Glee and how she struggled with anorexia during her teenage years. But it’s not all seriousness in Naya’s book. She also writes a love letter to the Tupperware party in her chest.

In that picture above, Naya’s plastic dome chichis look like they can’t stand each other. Naya’s right one looks like it can’t even look at the left one and is turning away. They look like they’re doing the tail end of the fight scene from The Notebook. But while Naya’s at-war titties don’t like each other, she loves them both so much. When 29-year-old Naya was 18, she used money from her acting jobs to buy herself some silicone chest dumplings. Naya writes in her book Sorry Not Sorry that her parents weren’t happy about her getting plastic surgery, but she was and practically screamed from the rooftops of her high school about her new tits. via People

“I went around to all my teachers, told them I was going to be out. ‘I’m getting plastic surgery!’ I’d tell them gleefully. My art teacher was stoked – when I told her she said that she too had fake tits and that she was very excited for me.

My new boobs were a confidence thing, not a sexual thing. I’d never even taken my top off for a guy. I hadn’t had many opportunities to do so, but even if I had, my bra was always stuffed with napkins. As soon as I went back to school, [the boys] all practically fell over themselves rushing to see who could hold the door open for me.

People have a lot of opinions about plastic surgery, but more than ten years after I got my boobs, they still make me happy when I look in the mirror. It might have even been the best $8K I’ve ever spent.”

Um, it’s a shame that Naya didn’t know that when you get plastic surgery in high school, you’re not supposed to admit it! There was a girl in my 11th grade class who totally had her nose cinched and rotated, but she told everyone that she just lost a bunch of baby fat. That’s how you’re supposed to do it! Naya should’ve just come back from break with bigger tits and told everyone that she just switched from cow milk to soy milk.

And after looking at pictures of Naya throughout the years, it looks like she may have pumped up her titty ball situation even more after high school. I’m sure Naya’s art teacher would still be stoked…if she could only remember who Naya was. “I don’t remember teaching a Kardashian…” is what her art teacher would say.

Pic: Wenn.com

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